Let the ass-kicking begin.
Seriously, did that all just happen? I don't think I breathed for the last 10 minutes of the show. Sayid episodes are always full of ass kicking - because, really, that's kind of all he's about - but Holy Smoke Monster! That was some crazy shit!
But before we get to that, let's take a look at what was happening off The Island. Don't worry. There was some serious ass kicking going on there, too.
Off Island
Sayid has just returned from his now non-doomed flight back from Australia. He rings the doorbell of a nice, suburban home and it's Nadiya! And she's wearing a wedding ring! But Sayid isn't. But they embrace and it's very sweet and now look! Kids! But, wait. They call him "Uncle Sayid". WTF? Looks like Nadiya is now married to Sayid's brother, Omar. Yep. There he is. Bummer, Sayid.
They all sit down for dinner and we learn that in this Alternate Universe life, Sayid travels the world as an Oil Contract Translator. It's all very boring. Really, it is. Sayid even says so himself. His brother owns a dry cleaning business that has just opened up a new store. How very exciting! During dinner, his brother gets a very important dry cleaning business phone call that he takes in the other room. While he's gone, Sayid and Nadiya bat eyelashes at each other. Sayid tells the kids to go get their presents from his luggage. The kids find a picture of Nadiya in there and come running out to tell their mom. She blushes and it looks like brother Omar overhears this. Stupid kids.
That night, Omar wakes Sayid up and tells him that the phone call was from some dudes he borrowed money from to open up the new dry cleaning store. He says he's paid them all back, but they want more. He wants Sayid to go "take care of them." In this life, Sayid still worked in the war as an Interrogator. A very thorough Interrogator. But, as usual, Sayid says no and that he is "not that man anymore." Sure, Sayid. You say that all the time, but you always end up killing people. Wait. Did I just stumble onto the whole point of this episode?
The next morning, Omar turns up stabbed in front of his store do to a "mugging." Sayid and Nadiya go to the hospital where they pass by Jack very briefly in the hallway. Sayid wants to go find the real stabbers, but Nadiya begs him not to and asks him to go home and watch the kids instead. That night when Nadiya returns from the hospital, she asks Sayid why he pushed her towards Omar. He tells her that he doesn't deserve her because of all the bad things he has done. God, Sayid. I wish my lawn was as emo as you so it would cut itself. So, do you think in this Alternate Universe, that Sayid also tortured Nadiya?
The next day, he's off to pick the kids up from school when he gets stopped by some goons. The same goons that messed his brother up. Sayid gets in their car and they take him to some restaurant kitchen. There's a guy making eggs. It's that awful dude from the freighter! Keamie! Meanie Keamie! I HATE this guy! He's walking around all douche like trying to get Sayid to eat his eggs but you know Sayid isn't falling for it. He's Sayid! Sayid confirms that these guys stabbed his brother and then he starts kicking ass! He's such a bad ass! First he grabs the guy standing next to him and uses him as a shield and one of the other goons shoots him. Then he takes the dead guy's gun and shoots the other guy. Then, after Keamie begs for his life, he shoots him! Ha! Stupid Keamie.
He then hears a noise coming from the freezer. He opens the door and tied to a chair is...Jin! What the hell?
On Island
Sayid is stalking around looking for answers. Because this is also what Sayid is all about: Finding answers. It's just that most of the time, he kills everyone before he gets the answer he needs. He was actually probably a real shitty Interrogator.
He finds Dokken sitting by himself. He demands his answers. Dokken tells him that every person has a scale that shows how much good and evil are in them. When they hooked Sayid up to that machine, it showed that Sayid has way more evil in him than good. Sayid goes on about how he is a good man. But then Dokken tries to kill him and then Sayid blocks and now everyone is kung-fu fighting! Okay, that was bad. I know. Okay, this fight goes on for a really long time. Really long. Dokken almost kills Sayid, but then his precious baseball falls on the floor and he stops himself. So, I guess the baseball isn't just a baseball after all. He tells Sayid to leave and never come back.
Outside the Temple, Claire and Unlocke are hanging out and being creepy. UnLocke wants Kate to do him a favor and if she does it, he will get her baaaaayyyyybeeeee back.
Claire enters The Temple and is immediately surrounded by people with guns. Sayid and Miles just stand and watch, oddly. You'd think this would be a prime time for Sayid to kick some ass to protect his friend, but he doesn't. Very strange. Claire approaches Dokken and tells him that "He" wants to talk to him outside. Of course Dokken doesn't go. He's beginning to look very frustrated. (Actually, his mystique is totally wearing away and he's starting to remind me of Dark Helmut from Spaceballs. I just expect him to start throwing a tantrum any
moment). They drag Claire away and Dokken asks Sayid to go talk to "Him". He gives Sayid a knife and says this person will show up as someone you know who is dead (like Mr.. Eko's brother!). Sayid will have to stab him before he speaks, otherwise he won't die. Sayid wants to know why he should do something for him after Dokken just banished him. Dokken says it's to prove there is still some good left in him. So, Sayid has to kill someone/thing to prove he is good. That's basically the story of his life.
Sayid heads out of the Temple and runs into Kate. A part of me was really hoping he though Kate was just the Smoke Monster and that he would stab her before she spoke. But he didn't. Dammit. Kate wants to know what's up. He tells her to talk to Miles. She goes inside and finds Miles and she seems so very happy lately. It's weird. After Miles makes fun of her for chasing after Sawyer (he knew exactly what Sawyer would do. Remember, he really lived with Sawyer for 3 years on The Island), he tells her Claire is back (and still hot - his words, not mine). This makes Kate even more happy.
Back outside the Temple, the wind picks up and Sayid looks panicked. Out from the brush steps UnLocke. UnLocke says "Hello, Sayid" and then Sayid stabs him! But, it's too late because he already spoke! UnLocke pulls the unbloody knife from his chest and tells Sayid he's stupid for listening to Dokken and wants Sayid to deliver a message. If he does, he will give him anything he wants. Sayid wants one thing that he can't have: his dead Nadiya back. But UnLocke says he can make it happen.
Sayid goes back to the Temple and delivers the message. The message? That Jacob is dead and that means they don't have to stay there anymore. If they want to leave, meet outside the Temple at sundown. Cindy, the flight attendant, asks what happens if they don't. Sayid: "You will die". Dun dun dunnnnnnnn.
Kate finds where Claire is being kept. It's inside the Temple at the bottom of a hole. She tells Claire that she has Aaron and that she has been raising him, she looks so proud of herself. This make for a very angry Claire. Kate says she's come to rescue Claire and bring her back to Aaron. Claire says she's not the one who needs rescuing and then the guards pull Kate away. Dammit. Will someone please unleash Claire onto Kate?
Sayid wanders into that Temple pool and sees Dokken sitting there playing with that darn baseball. Sayid wants to know what is going on. Dokken tells Sayid the reason he is there. Before Dokken came to The Island, he worked for a bank. He got promoted and his co-workers took him out for happy hour. Afterwards, Dokken had to pick his kid up from school. He got into a drunk driving accident. Jacob appeared at the hospital and said he will let his son live if Dokken agrees to come to The Island and never see his son again. So he did. So, I guess the baseball is his kid's? Sayid looks all sympathetic for a second and then? He tosses Dokken into the pool and drowns him! WTF, Sayid? You are a very bad man! Then that Lennon guy comes running in. He freaks out and says with Dokken dead, Smokey can just waltz right in. Sayid says he knows and cuts Lennon's throat!!!! Oh, no, Sayid!!!!!
And then it's sundown. Some of The Other's have decided to stay with The Temple. That familiar Smokey noise begins and then here he is!!! It's Smokey in all his Smokey glory and he is PISSED! He starts tearing through the temple and killing everyone! Just like Jacob and Ben and Richard and Dokken all said he wanted to do. So does this confirm that Smokey is indeed evil? I think so.
Miles and Kate start running together until she wants to run off and find Claire. (I've got to say, I think Miles is a great addition to the cast. He makes Kate tolerable. He's not really involved in anyone's ordeal, so he just works on a real normal guy level. A normal guy that can talk to dead people).
Miles finds a room to hide in and then in walks Ben! and Sun! and the Pilot! and NotFBIChick! I forgot about these guys! Ben wants to know where everyone is (or, at least, all the special ones - he doesn't care where Kate is). He says Sayid is out by the pool and Ben goes to find him. Sayid is just sitting there with the bloody knife in
his hand. He looks up at Ben and Ben does the totally awesome "back away slowly" move. Sun, Miles, and the Pilot, follow NotFBIChick into a secret door in the wall. They manage to escape Smokey, for now. It seems that Sun and everyone have all been filled in on what is happening on The Island. I wish they'd share that info with me.
Kate, who still doesn't see the creepiness that is now Claire, tries to get her to leave. But Claire refuses. Smokey enters the room and Kate jumps into the hole with Claire. But Claire doesn't kill her. Come on, Claire!
Once things have quieted down, Kate walks out of the Temple with Claire and Sayid. She looks very confused. Claire and Sayid look totally at peace. There are dead bodies everywhere. Outside the Temple stands UnLocke and his army of Others who decided to leave the Temple at sundown.
Seriously, did that all just happen? I don't think I breathed for the last 10 minutes of the show. Sayid episodes are always full of ass kicking - because, really, that's kind of all he's about - but Holy Smoke Monster! That was some crazy shit!
But before we get to that, let's take a look at what was happening off The Island. Don't worry. There was some serious ass kicking going on there, too.
Off Island
Sayid has just returned from his now non-doomed flight back from Australia. He rings the doorbell of a nice, suburban home and it's Nadiya! And she's wearing a wedding ring! But Sayid isn't. But they embrace and it's very sweet and now look! Kids! But, wait. They call him "Uncle Sayid". WTF? Looks like Nadiya is now married to Sayid's brother, Omar. Yep. There he is. Bummer, Sayid.
They all sit down for dinner and we learn that in this Alternate Universe life, Sayid travels the world as an Oil Contract Translator. It's all very boring. Really, it is. Sayid even says so himself. His brother owns a dry cleaning business that has just opened up a new store. How very exciting! During dinner, his brother gets a very important dry cleaning business phone call that he takes in the other room. While he's gone, Sayid and Nadiya bat eyelashes at each other. Sayid tells the kids to go get their presents from his luggage. The kids find a picture of Nadiya in there and come running out to tell their mom. She blushes and it looks like brother Omar overhears this. Stupid kids.
That night, Omar wakes Sayid up and tells him that the phone call was from some dudes he borrowed money from to open up the new dry cleaning store. He says he's paid them all back, but they want more. He wants Sayid to go "take care of them." In this life, Sayid still worked in the war as an Interrogator. A very thorough Interrogator. But, as usual, Sayid says no and that he is "not that man anymore." Sure, Sayid. You say that all the time, but you always end up killing people. Wait. Did I just stumble onto the whole point of this episode?
The next morning, Omar turns up stabbed in front of his store do to a "mugging." Sayid and Nadiya go to the hospital where they pass by Jack very briefly in the hallway. Sayid wants to go find the real stabbers, but Nadiya begs him not to and asks him to go home and watch the kids instead. That night when Nadiya returns from the hospital, she asks Sayid why he pushed her towards Omar. He tells her that he doesn't deserve her because of all the bad things he has done. God, Sayid. I wish my lawn was as emo as you so it would cut itself. So, do you think in this Alternate Universe, that Sayid also tortured Nadiya?
The next day, he's off to pick the kids up from school when he gets stopped by some goons. The same goons that messed his brother up. Sayid gets in their car and they take him to some restaurant kitchen. There's a guy making eggs. It's that awful dude from the freighter! Keamie! Meanie Keamie! I HATE this guy! He's walking around all douche like trying to get Sayid to eat his eggs but you know Sayid isn't falling for it. He's Sayid! Sayid confirms that these guys stabbed his brother and then he starts kicking ass! He's such a bad ass! First he grabs the guy standing next to him and uses him as a shield and one of the other goons shoots him. Then he takes the dead guy's gun and shoots the other guy. Then, after Keamie begs for his life, he shoots him! Ha! Stupid Keamie.
He then hears a noise coming from the freezer. He opens the door and tied to a chair is...Jin! What the hell?
On Island
Sayid is stalking around looking for answers. Because this is also what Sayid is all about: Finding answers. It's just that most of the time, he kills everyone before he gets the answer he needs. He was actually probably a real shitty Interrogator.
He finds Dokken sitting by himself. He demands his answers. Dokken tells him that every person has a scale that shows how much good and evil are in them. When they hooked Sayid up to that machine, it showed that Sayid has way more evil in him than good. Sayid goes on about how he is a good man. But then Dokken tries to kill him and then Sayid blocks and now everyone is kung-fu fighting! Okay, that was bad. I know. Okay, this fight goes on for a really long time. Really long. Dokken almost kills Sayid, but then his precious baseball falls on the floor and he stops himself. So, I guess the baseball isn't just a baseball after all. He tells Sayid to leave and never come back.
Outside the Temple, Claire and Unlocke are hanging out and being creepy. UnLocke wants Kate to do him a favor and if she does it, he will get her baaaaayyyyybeeeee back.
Claire enters The Temple and is immediately surrounded by people with guns. Sayid and Miles just stand and watch, oddly. You'd think this would be a prime time for Sayid to kick some ass to protect his friend, but he doesn't. Very strange. Claire approaches Dokken and tells him that "He" wants to talk to him outside. Of course Dokken doesn't go. He's beginning to look very frustrated. (Actually, his mystique is totally wearing away and he's starting to remind me of Dark Helmut from Spaceballs. I just expect him to start throwing a tantrum any
moment). They drag Claire away and Dokken asks Sayid to go talk to "Him". He gives Sayid a knife and says this person will show up as someone you know who is dead (like Mr.. Eko's brother!). Sayid will have to stab him before he speaks, otherwise he won't die. Sayid wants to know why he should do something for him after Dokken just banished him. Dokken says it's to prove there is still some good left in him. So, Sayid has to kill someone/thing to prove he is good. That's basically the story of his life.Sayid heads out of the Temple and runs into Kate. A part of me was really hoping he though Kate was just the Smoke Monster and that he would stab her before she spoke. But he didn't. Dammit. Kate wants to know what's up. He tells her to talk to Miles. She goes inside and finds Miles and she seems so very happy lately. It's weird. After Miles makes fun of her for chasing after Sawyer (he knew exactly what Sawyer would do. Remember, he really lived with Sawyer for 3 years on The Island), he tells her Claire is back (and still hot - his words, not mine). This makes Kate even more happy.
Back outside the Temple, the wind picks up and Sayid looks panicked. Out from the brush steps UnLocke. UnLocke says "Hello, Sayid" and then Sayid stabs him! But, it's too late because he already spoke! UnLocke pulls the unbloody knife from his chest and tells Sayid he's stupid for listening to Dokken and wants Sayid to deliver a message. If he does, he will give him anything he wants. Sayid wants one thing that he can't have: his dead Nadiya back. But UnLocke says he can make it happen.
Sayid goes back to the Temple and delivers the message. The message? That Jacob is dead and that means they don't have to stay there anymore. If they want to leave, meet outside the Temple at sundown. Cindy, the flight attendant, asks what happens if they don't. Sayid: "You will die". Dun dun dunnnnnnnn.
Kate finds where Claire is being kept. It's inside the Temple at the bottom of a hole. She tells Claire that she has Aaron and that she has been raising him, she looks so proud of herself. This make for a very angry Claire. Kate says she's come to rescue Claire and bring her back to Aaron. Claire says she's not the one who needs rescuing and then the guards pull Kate away. Dammit. Will someone please unleash Claire onto Kate?
Sayid wanders into that Temple pool and sees Dokken sitting there playing with that darn baseball. Sayid wants to know what is going on. Dokken tells Sayid the reason he is there. Before Dokken came to The Island, he worked for a bank. He got promoted and his co-workers took him out for happy hour. Afterwards, Dokken had to pick his kid up from school. He got into a drunk driving accident. Jacob appeared at the hospital and said he will let his son live if Dokken agrees to come to The Island and never see his son again. So he did. So, I guess the baseball is his kid's? Sayid looks all sympathetic for a second and then? He tosses Dokken into the pool and drowns him! WTF, Sayid? You are a very bad man! Then that Lennon guy comes running in. He freaks out and says with Dokken dead, Smokey can just waltz right in. Sayid says he knows and cuts Lennon's throat!!!! Oh, no, Sayid!!!!!
And then it's sundown. Some of The Other's have decided to stay with The Temple. That familiar Smokey noise begins and then here he is!!! It's Smokey in all his Smokey glory and he is PISSED! He starts tearing through the temple and killing everyone! Just like Jacob and Ben and Richard and Dokken all said he wanted to do. So does this confirm that Smokey is indeed evil? I think so.Miles and Kate start running together until she wants to run off and find Claire. (I've got to say, I think Miles is a great addition to the cast. He makes Kate tolerable. He's not really involved in anyone's ordeal, so he just works on a real normal guy level. A normal guy that can talk to dead people).
Miles finds a room to hide in and then in walks Ben! and Sun! and the Pilot! and NotFBIChick! I forgot about these guys! Ben wants to know where everyone is (or, at least, all the special ones - he doesn't care where Kate is). He says Sayid is out by the pool and Ben goes to find him. Sayid is just sitting there with the bloody knife in
his hand. He looks up at Ben and Ben does the totally awesome "back away slowly" move. Sun, Miles, and the Pilot, follow NotFBIChick into a secret door in the wall. They manage to escape Smokey, for now. It seems that Sun and everyone have all been filled in on what is happening on The Island. I wish they'd share that info with me.Kate, who still doesn't see the creepiness that is now Claire, tries to get her to leave. But Claire refuses. Smokey enters the room and Kate jumps into the hole with Claire. But Claire doesn't kill her. Come on, Claire!
Once things have quieted down, Kate walks out of the Temple with Claire and Sayid. She looks very confused. Claire and Sayid look totally at peace. There are dead bodies everywhere. Outside the Temple stands UnLocke and his army of Others who decided to leave the Temple at sundown.
They all turn and walk into the jungle.
The end
Let's take a moment to assess where everyone is:
-Kate is now stuck with the badies. These people include UnLocke and creepy Claire. Now with bonus creepy Sayid action!
-Miles, Sun, the Pilot, and NotFBIChick are hiding in the Temple. Ben is also in the Temple, but I'm not sure if he got back in time to hide with them.
-Sawyer is wasted away again in Dharmaville. Presumably looking for his lost shaker of salt.
-Hurley, Jack, and all of Jack's baggage are back at the Lighthouse with ghost Jacob. Jacob is going to bring them somewhere safe, I think.
-Jin is sitting in Claire's Creepy Camp with a bloody broken ankle. I hope someone finds him. Preferably Jack and Hurley. Or even Sawyer.
-Richard was on his way back to the Temple what seems like days ago. I wonder if he made it?
-And Rose and Bernard and Vincent are still hanging out somewhere eating pineapples and drinking coconut juice. At least, I hope.
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