Miley Cyrus at Xcel Energy Center 3/10/14

My friend was given free tickets to the Miley Cyrus concert on Monday. So we went.

I have not been quiet about my absolute love for Miley's song "We Can't Stop". I love pop music and I get incredibly frustrated with people who are so quick to dismiss a good pop song because the person singing it didn't write it or is song by some sort of "pop tart". I understand just not liking a song. There is a lot of music a lot of people love that I just don't understand. But the dismissal I hear about Miley has less to do with her songs and more to do with her sticking her tongue out all of the time and being "raunchy". Which is stupid. As I know most of those same people adored Madonna back in the day when she was the raunchy one, slithering around in a sexed up wedding dress on the floor of the MTV Video Music Awards.

 )

I'm also not going to lavish praise on Miley's catalog of songs because there is a lot of shit there. A lot. But when my friend and I posted on Facebook that we were going to this show - or free, people were perplexed. Why? Why would you do something like that??? I thought you had good taste in music. 

Why? Why would we? Because it's fun. And it was so much fun.

Our tickets were in a suite pretty close the stage. There was free beer and food. The night was already off to a good start.

Then Miley appeared...

 ...out of an image of her own face on a tongue slide.

From the very first moment this show was all about the fun. The raunch levels that people were so aghast about were so very minimal. To me, she seemed like a woman completely self-aware about the image she partially created and has had partially built up around her by everyone else. On the giant screen at the back of the stage, during costume changes and dance interludes, were videos seemingly mocking her own image. Lots of tongue sticking out.

Miley herself appeared confident and in charge. She owned the stage. She entertained. Yes, she did it in high-cut leotards, but so what? Yes she grabbed her crotch a few times, but so what? So did Michael Jackson and Madonna. So do countless other male pop stars. I spent my tween years lusting after 20-something New Kids on the Block members literally thrusting their crotches in the faces of teenage (and younger) girls much to the delight of said girls and their mothers. Where was the uproar?

I was only familiar with three of Miley's songs going into the show: "We Can't Stop", "Wrecking Ball", and "Party in the USA" - though the latter I'd only heard maybe once - and all of these songs came in at the encore. But I still enjoyed the show. She did play a series of covers on a smaller stage: Bob Dylan's "It Ain't Me, Babe", Outkast's "Hey Ya", Dolly Parton's "Jolene" and another I was not familiar with and they were fairly decent stripped down covers. She really can sing. I think it would benefit her greatly to sing more softly and play with her voice a little more, but the music she sings doesn't really allow for that.

The show was one big spectacle for sure, but I mean that in a good way. At one pointed I tweeted that I felt like I was in a bag of skittles. Bright colors bouncing along everywhere. Puppets and dancing. It was ridiculous, in the best way.

Dancing puppets.

I left the show liking Miley Cyrus more than I did when I got there, which really is the point of a live show (and it was live - did I mention that? There was no doubt her vocals were live). And after a very tough couple of weeks that I keep meaning to write about but I just don't have the energy to summarize, it was exactly what I needed.

You see her rollin', you be hatin'.

On the big screen, completely covered.

She requested we turn our phones into flashlights. I don't know how to do that. Looked cool, though.

Giant dog statue. Because she can't be tamed.

Pre-encore departure via giant hotdog.

"Party in the USA" grand finale.

The 2013 Grammy Awards

Good morning. I hope it’s a good morning for you. Mine has been rather pitiful. Oddly it has nothing to do with being up late watching those Grammy awards. More along the lines of I have exactly 2 pairs of pants in my wardrobe and they are both falling apart and coming to the realization that I have absolutely nothing to wear to work the rest of the week. Like, for reals. Like, not even overreacting.

I’m also seriously hating this weather. I think I’m getting a little S.A.D. I just want to see grass again. So does Robbie. This is him sadly looking out the window as the snow fell yesterday:

But I did watch The Grammys last night. All of them. Every last performance and acceptance speech and awkward silences after LL Cool J said something.  I haven’t been invested in The Grammys since the grunge era, but I still feel I must watch.

And, I must be old, because I just don’t get it anymore.

Granted, The Grammys have never actually been about what’s really good in music right now. There are exceptions, though. I assume they get pop music right with Adele and Kelly Clarkson. But maybe I’m wrong. Maybe there are underground pop stars not getting their due. Of course then they woudn’t be pop stars.

I just think about my Favorite Albums of 2012 and am floored that Sharon Van Etten’s Tramp was not nominated for album of the year. It’s a stunning album. And it seems like it would be right up the Grammys’ alley.

Fiona Apple was nominated for Best Alternative Music Album, but lost to Gotye (who also won Record of the Year for that song where he does the Sting impersonation).

Frank Ocean did beat Chris Brown – which was maybe The Grammys way of apologizing for giving that awful human so much screen time last year. Then Frank Ocean went and screwed it all up by singing a song about Forrest Gump. For reals. Forrest Gump. What I thought was odd was everyone on the Twitter freaking out about it, too. But I guess I assumed the song was on his album that EVERYBODY claimed to have bought and LOVED and OMG IT IS THE GREATEST ALBUM EVER!!! And a quick Google search tells me that it is indeed on the album…so did anyone actually listen to this album or just did they just like the one single and assume he was the greatest thing to happen to the music scene?

The other nominee in that category was a guy named Miguel. I had never heard of him before, but he performed last night and it was the only performance of the night that I actually turned my TV up. So I might check him out.

I had to mute the TV for Mumford and Sons. 

 
That song – which shall go unnamed because saying it aloud automatically staples it to my brain – is pretty much the worst thing in my life right now – and that’s saying something. The Mumfords also won Album of the Year. So, maybe now they will take a break and get out of my life. They are inescapable….the definition of overplayed. It’s best for everyone involved if they take a break for a while. Maybe try to write a song that doesn’t start out quiet and then rapidly build to speed bluegrass. Speed bluegrass. That’s a thing now.

Sidenote: I have a banjo. I even wrote a song on it recently. But I am going to redo the song because Mumford and Sons have killed the banjo for me.

Wow. I sound pretty bitter, don’t I?

I didn’t hate it all. I’m so happy Kelly Clarkson won and we got to hear her sing. I just love her. She’s the best. And so adorable and honest. Her speech was just so earnest.

Beyonce and Ellen introducing Justin Timberlake were also adorable. And Justin put on an excellent performance – as he always does. And then Jay-Z joined him on stage and Jay-Z is The Coolest Person EVER, so that was good.

I was enjoying LL Cool J and Chuck D’s closing song, but then they through advertisements over it and that was just gross. Especially since they were attempting to pay tribute to MCA.

And the country singers were fine and unoffensive as usual.

Oh, and Jack White. Jack White was awesome. I need to put that album on my get list.

Gloria Estefan is in My Brain

Somehow Gloria Estefan’s musical catalogue has infiltrated its way into my brain and presses play almost every morning when I get in the shower. I don’t know where this comes from. It’s not like I wake up to Lite FM on the alarm clock every morning. It’s not like I have any of her songs on any of my musical devices. And it’s not like I go to bed thinking about her at night.

Yet, multiple times a week, I get up, step into the shower, and suddenly I’m singing one of her many hits from the 80s. The most popular track is the uber-power ballad “Don’t Want to Lose You”. 

It shows up in different sections. Usually the first line: “Sometimes it’s hard” but other times I mind goes straight into the big chorus “I don’t want to lose you now!”.

This morning it was “1-2-3-4”. 

I haven’t thought about this song in years. I have no idea how it found its way into my brain. If I was counting, I would think the more current “1234” by Feist would be the song that would take over. But no. It was Gloria Estefan once again.

Other songs of hers that pop up in the mornings: “Bad Boys” and the big song “Coming Out of the Dark”. Remember that song? Remember how she got into a horrible bus accident and was almost paralyzed, but then she came out of the dark and could walk and dance again?

Not sure what she’s up to these days. Has she regrouped with the Miami Sound Machine? Has she aged well? I don’t know. I suppose I could look it up, but I’m really not all that interested.

But, I think one of these vocal talent shows should pick her up. If I remember, from the days I used to watch those shows, her songs are quite popular with the contestants.

Or maybe she’s been busy creating some sort of mind control device that makes it so I wake up to her songs every morning.

Davy Jones

Davy Jones of The Monkees died of heart attack yesterday at the age of 66. I loved The Monkees growing up when I would watch the reruns on Nick at Nite. When VH1 picked up the show and started replaying the episodes when I was a teenager, I loved them again. And whenVH1 made that made for TV movie about The Monkees in my early 20s, I was once again reminded how good their songs were and how funny that show was.

So, thanks for the laughs, Davy Jones. And Axel Rose thanks you for the side to side shuffle step he stole from you.

Here's one of my favorite Davy Jones' sung Monkees' songs:

Grammys 2012

Oh, Grammys. What has become of you?

Not that the Grammys ever should be considered the be all and end all of good musical taste, but what a junk fest it has become.

Let’s start with the most obvious piece of junk: Chris Brown. The Grammys gave a guy who, just a few years before on the eve of the Grammys, beat the shit out of his then girlfriend, Rihanna, multiple performance spots last night and an award. W.T.F. I understand that he “did his time” or whatever. Although, all I ever saw was him riding a jet ski and having a ball with other young ladies post-beat down. Never once did he show regret or sincere sorrow for what he did. He issued some publicist written apology and has his mom go on Twitter and defend him. And, I’m sorry, but he beat her up. It wasn’t just a light tap on the cheek (not that that would be okay, either). He beat her up. I have no tolerance for that and I don’t think the Grammys and the Grammy voters should either. But to see the way the crowd reacted when he performed and won, well, I’m disgusted (I’m looking at you, Diana Ross).

And then there’s Rihanna herself. Asked to perform at the same show. I read the gossip blogs. I know she is back to being on good terms with him. She’s young and apparently not that bright. But what can you expect when her whole community, basically the company she works for, gives her every indication that what he did to her was okay and she should really forgive him by now? I mean, everyone else has, right? Especially the Grammys, who are the realvictims here (seriously, they said that. Check out that link).

But, I’ve wasted enough space on that douchebag. Moving on.

There were a slight number of musical performances that were somewhat worth discussing and an even slighter number of awards given out on air.

The show kicked off with Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band being Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band. I love Bruce, but they’ve really nailed down their formula and stuck with it, haven’t they? I never would have guessed what they performed was a new song. But, really, what else are they going to do? Immediately afterward, LL Cool J (the host for the night for some reason) led everyone in a prayer for Whitney Houston. A prayer. At a nationally televised awards program filled with people from all walks of life. Personally, I just thought that wasn’t really the right way to go about things, though I do know that Whitney loved her Jesus.

Bruno Mars shocked me by making me notice him. To my knowledge, I had not heard a Bruno Mars song before last night. He has the whole James Brown vibe going on. Very energetic. Very entertaining.

So far so good, Grammys.

Whitney tribute #2 was a duet between Alicia Keys and Bonnie Raitt singing an Etta James’ song  – oh, wait. This was a tribute to Etta  James. But, Alicia through in a little “miss you, Whitney” or something to that affect that got the Twitterverse all up in arms. Here’s the thing: 1) Alicia should have left Whitney’s name out of that tribute. That was Etta’s moment. 2) Later during the Memoriam, Etta was left off, but Whitney was added. Why? Why? Screamed the Twitterverse. Here’s why: Etta died after the Grammy’s cut-off date (as did Don Cornelius). Typically, they would get their respect In Memoriam next year. Same thing happened to Amy Winehouse last year (which is why she was included in the In Memoriam this year). But, being the big players in music that they were, they each got their tribute: Alicia Keys and Bonnie Raitt sang an Etta James song and the Grammys thought Chris Brown dancing would be a good way to honor Don Cornelius. So, why did Whitney get so much air time? Because she died suddenly the night before at the age of 48! Geez, people. It was a shock. She was a huge part of Grammys past. And it happened less than 24 hours earlier. If they didn’t do anything people would have been furious.

So, yeah.

And Bonnie Raitt can really fucking sing. Smooth.

The Foo Fighters were asked to stay outside for their two performances, except for when they won Best Rock Album (where they were up against such notable rock acts as Mumford and Sons and The Decemberists). But even then, they were booted off stage rather quickly when Dave Grohl started bashing auto-tune and computers and manufactured music. Somebody had to say it. Thank you, Dave.

And speaking of Foo Fighters performing twice (with Dave Grohl actually getting a third time during the guitar solo-fest at the end of the night), why did so many people get to perform multiple times? Makes no sense. Yet they couldn’t give Bon Iver solo stage time to perform their song that was nominated for Song and Record of the Year? Paul McCartney played twice. Bruce Springsteen joined in on the guitar solo stand-off, so he was on stage twice. Chris Brown played twice. Chris Brown??? But no Bon Iver. Makes. No. Sense.

Speaking of Bon Iver, he did take home two awards last night. Best Alternative Album and Best New Artist. Hopefully the Best New Artist curse has waned. It’s got to be weird though. He went from near obscurity to major Grammy nominee and winner. Now what? What’s funny is that he’ll probably go back to Wisconsin and keep doing what he’s doing. The Grammys and the mainstream will consider him a failure, but the “real” music industry will know the truth. Keep doing what you’re doing, dude.

(Also, I would just like to add that he thanked Eau Claire which is in Wisconsin NOT Minnesota. I know we like to claim him as our own, but then we need to start rallying around other Wisconsin acts, too. Otherwise this just comes off as desperate, Minnesota.)

I’m sure Bon Iver was even more relieved he chose not to participate in that Beach Boys…thing. Why is it necessary to bring in other bands to play their songs? Why couldn’t they just wheel the Beach Boys out on stage and let that be it? Why let Maroon 5 and Foster the People do that to them (and us)?

Jennifer Hudson gave a remarkable performance tribute to Whitney Houston by singing “I Will Always Love You”. I don’t know how she got through that without breaking down. Especially after watching the video below. She is a total pro.

Adele gave a great performance of her song “Rolling in the Deep”. I believe it was her first performance since undergoing throat surgery. How terrifying would that be? I’ve had a slight lump in my throat for the past couple of days and I am all concerned about my voice and singing and I’m just a local singer/songwriter. Can you imagine being Adele and having to take a knife to your vocal chords? Terrifying. She sang beautifully. And she won all the other awards – rightfully so. And how fun was it to see Dan Wilson standing behind her as she accepted her Album of the Year award? He’s just so pleasant.

Other Items of Note:

• Paul McCartney is old now. Like really old.
• Katy Perry’s star seems to be fading at a rapid pace. I know she’s sold all the albums ever, but I don’t think people care anymore. There was a general feeling of meh during her performance. Both online and  it looked like in the Staples Center.
• I was really excited to see Nicki Minaj because I thought she would be awesome (from all I heard), but I was just confused. Maybe I am really old now.
• Lady GaGa has gone past eccentric and is now just trying way too hard.

All in all, it was a good show. I managed to watch the whole thing, which is rare. I just wish they didn’t try so hard to resurrect Chris Brown’s career. He doesn’t deserve it and there are plenty of other R & B/ Rappers to take his place that don’t beat their girlfriends. His presence turned a nice evening into something kind of gross.

My Thoughts On Whitney Houston

Whitney Houston died tonight.

It's weird. I'm struck by just how sad I am at hearing the news. I didn't know her personally. But, still, I feel like someone I used to know - a long lost friend or relative - someone that really meant something to me at one time has died.

And it's very sad.

Whitney was my first idol. I loved her. I wanted to be her. I look back at the time in my life when I first came to love her: I was about 7 or 8 years old. My mom had just died about a year before. I took to Whitney in a strange way. My adoration of her was stronger than anyone probably ever knew. As a little girl I would try so hard to sing as big as she did. And sometimes, I truly believed I was succeeding. I'd watch her music videos and then, as soon as they ended, I would pretend that I was her in those videos by throwing on her tape and mimicking the moves: The finger snaps, the foot shuffles, the head jerks.

I had her poster on my wall.

This was the video I tried to copy the most:

She came to play in town around that time. I can't recall if it was at the State Fair or some other festival, but I know there were rides there. My sister surprised me and my niece (and best friend), Kimi (her daughter who is around my age) with "tickets" to see her perform. We were so excited. We got to the festival and, unfortunately, we didn't actually have tickets. We stood behind the fence behind the very last row of actual ticket holders and listened to her. She was a tiny dot on the stage, shuffling back and forth...but her voice carried all the way back. There were crates next to us and some other non-ticket holders were standing on them. They let us join them up there and then even let us use their binoculars so we could see. I can still remember that view of Whitney very clearly. And, at that age, I didn't care that we weren't up front. Because, in my mind, we were. Although, I'm pretty sure I went there thinking that I was going to get an autograph. It was my first concert. I didn't know how they worked.

I loved all of her songs and followed her loyally through The Bodyguard - though maybe not as openly. Whitney and my junior high "style" didn't really go hand in hand.

But, probably my favorite of them all is a song called "All At Once" off of her debut album. As I was saying above, when Whitney first really gained popularity, it was right after my mom died. My dad and I  were living in an apartment. I would try to sleep in my own room at night, but would inevitably end up pulling my mattress into his room and sleeping on the mattress on the floor. I would bring my tape player  with me and I would put on her debut album (Whitney Houston) and fall asleep to it. But every time this song came on, I would sing along to it very quietly and usually start crying. I think it was the first song I ever really got. I ever connected with emotionally. I could identify with the lyrics. And I still can't listen to it without bawling. As I'm doing now.



I don't know why I did this. My adult self imagines it's because when my mother was alive and fighting cancer, she used to let me sleep in bed with her and my father. I'd sleep right between them - even at 6 years old - and probably drive them crazy all night. I think some strange part of me felt like laying on the floor next to my dad's bed and listening to Whitney, well, I think it made it feel like it was before. And my dad, being the grieving widower and now single father to a little girl, had no idea what to do and just did everything he could to make me happy. But, man, how did her ever sleep with a seven year old on the floor next to him singing along to Whitney Houston every night? (love you dad)

So, yeah, Whitney Houston meant something to me. When I was a little girl, she sang me through my pain - like my mom used to do. I've always held onto that.

Thanks, Whitney.

So Many Things!

I have been such a bad blogger and there have been so many things I've wanted to write about - not anything deeply important - just random things and then suddenly the list got so long and I got overwhelmed and had no idea where to even begin.

So here it all is in list form;

1. My husband got a new job! It's pretty exciting. It's a perfect fit for him. I tell ya, there is a lot of good job karma floating around out there right now. If you've been looking and you stopped for whatever reason, start again. Good things are happening for a lot of people.

2. I'm home today as part of my new alternative work schedule for my new job. It's pretty awesome. I got so much done already and it's not even noon yet. My website has been updated. Show requests have been sent. Laundry has been started. I've showered. It's been a good day. It's so nice to have these days.

3. Speaking of shows, I'm playing at the Fine Line on Monday, February 20th. It's a free show. I know it's a Monday and Monday's are a hard day to go out, but it's early (I go on around 8:30) and it's kind of important that I get people to this one. So if you've ever thought about coming to see me, but always thought you'd just catch me at a later day, well, the later date has arrived! I hope to see you!

4. I've been keeping up with recording updates, but did you know that I'm also about half way through with writing a new album? I've got about 6 songs started. Very basic at this point, but still they are started. I think when I'm done recording this album, I might just keep going and start on the next one.

5. And finally in my personal music news, I'm in a contest! It's Vita.MN's Are You Local Best New Band contest and I would love it if you sent a vote my way!

6. Everybody has been talking about this Gotye guy for a really long time now. I remember seeing the video posted on Facebook back late last year. I ignored it. Then it just kept popping up. Then people starting posting all these cover renditions and then I just thought it was some sort of internet meme that was lost on me so I continued to ignore it. Then a friend asked if I wanted to go see this Gotye guy when he comes to town...so I finally went to check out this song...and, well, it's not bad. I can see the appeal. But it totally reminds me late 80s Sting, which is not a bad thing. Sting rules.

7. Speaking of other music people have been talking about: Lana Del Rey. I had not heard any of her songs, and like with a lot of people, my first real exposure to her was her dreadful SNL performance. But, last night on a whim, I went to listen to some song samples on iTunes, and, yeah, it's really good stuff. I totally dug and can totally see myself singing those songs while drinking many beers and hanging out in my living room. I'm totally going to buy it. Just like the rest of the world.

8. Bon Iver has been all over the music news places for, basically, dissing the Grammys. I know the Grammys are barely about the music these days and have lost any sort of integrity they once had, but they are still the Grammys. I'd be ridiculously excited to win one - or, yes, honored just to be nominated. But I also understand the grossness of it all and I get his stance with not being all that excited about it. So whatever. Either way, the guy is amazing and I found this video of him performing a solo version of "Skinny Love" on Later with Jools Holland and it took my breath away.



9. So much music stuff....so Erin McKeown is in the studio finishing up an album and Amanda Palmer just announced she will be going in to record in a couple of weeks. So add them to the list of ladies I love who will be releasing albums (most likely) this year. It's going to be a fantastic year for music. Also, here is Amanda Palmer's new video for her cover of Nirvana's "Polly". Haunting.



10. Madonna played the Superbowl and she released a new single and it is so beneath her. If it was a song by, oh, I don't know, some young pop star, I'd think it was a fun little song. But, sorry, she is too old for this. I hate to rag on her because she's all grows up now, but, Madonna, come on. And then I feel even more bad because it seems over the past year people have really been commenting on all of her plastic surgery and weird overly yoga'd arms and, as an aging pop star, that has to be incredibly difficult to deal with. Then I saw that she's taken to wearing gloves and I assume it's also because your hands are the one thing that will show your real age and I've seen people all over the gossip blogs comment on her hands and how old they look and then suddenly she has a new movie and a new album and she's covering her hands with gloves...and it's kind of sad. But then I remember she's Madonna and there are many other people in the world to feel bad for.

11. I was sick last week (shocker) and stayed home and watched a bunch of movies: The Day After Tomorrow, The Aviator, and The Island. All of them I've seen before. But, I've just got to say, The Day After Tomorrow fills me with so much frustration. I know it's just a big special effects movie, but you'd think in a movie that deals with cold that they would research cold. It just shows that Hollywood has no idea how cold cold is. It is about 20 degrees outside right now in Minnesota. I have to catch the bus later today. I will be dressed warm and most likely I will find myself still shivering while I wait. Physically trembling. Nobody trembled in this movie. Now, in 20 degrees, I will probably not wear gloves, but most people do. But this movie takes place in temperatures that cause the ocean to freeze. At one point, Jake Gyllenhaal and his friends have to outrun freezing. I don't even know how that is possible. Basically they are trying to outrun air. Yet, he is not wearing gloves. Or a hat. At one point he grabs onto a metal ladder. Without gloves. In the freezing. It makes me crazy. Come on, Hollywood.

12. So, as I said above, I also watched The Aviator. Great movie. Then the next day I watched Inception again. Also a great movie. Both star Leonardo DiCaprio. I've decided I really like Leonardo DiCaprio. He makes good movies. Good for him. Remember how after Titanic he came out with that movie The Beach and everyone thought he would just waste away in teenage idolhood?

13. The Island is stupid (and way too long). Don't bother. Although Ewan McGreoger and Scarlett Johansson are both very pretty.

14. In order to try to stop being sick all the time, I bought a whole bunch of immune system boosting foods at the grocery store last weekend. One of those things is garlic. I've read that eating 2 cloves of garlic a day does wonders for your immune system. Don't Do This. I had 4-5 little nibbles off of one clove and my stomach went sour and I smelled like and tasted garlic for 2 days after. Bad idea. I can't imagine what people who actually do this smell like. Not worth it.

15. And, finally, if you are like me at all and are not a fan of children or parent's who think their kids are the center of the world and the greatest thing ever and that everyone should be totally amazed that they were able to produce one and act like they are the first people in the world to ever have a baby...then you should go read this site: STFU, Parents.  Hilarious.

With that, I believe I am all caught up.

Back to your regularly scheduled posting soon.

Makes Sense To Me

Lyle Lovett's song "Nobody Knows Me" shuffled onto the iPod this afternoon. That guy...can sing. You know how people say "That person has a voice like butter"? If you don't know what that means, go listen to Lyle Lovett. You will understand.

When he was married to Julia Roberts, people were shocked that someone who looks like Julia would marry someone who looks like Lyle.

At least he wears shoes.

Because that's all that matters, right? He couldn't possibly have had a great personality, made her laugh, or you know just sung to her until she burst, right?

What I'm trying to say is, I get it, Julia. It makes sense to me. He can make you swoon while singing about how he just cheated on you.

Here he is performing this song on some show I don't know the name of with Willie Nelson sitting at his side. And if Willie Nelson is your friend, I'd marry you, too.

C'mon, Vogue!

I used to be able to do the dance routine to the chorus of this song. I used to whip it out at weddings when I was a teenager and "impress" my family.



Okay, for real, I used to know this entire routine.

Now I'm just going to listen to this song while I go file.

I'm all grows up.

And Madonna is freaky now.

That is all.

MTV "Video" "Music" "Awards"

The earliest MTV Video Music Awards I remember watching live was back in 1988. I don't know how into it I was, as the only performance I remember seeing was Guns N' Roses performance of "Welcome to the Jungle".

I don't care what you say, they were an amazing band.

Being that I was 9, I wasn't quite into them yet. That would be another year or so.

1989 was the first year I was really into the Video Music Awards. Though looking back at the performances, I'm shocked I cared so much. The Cult, Cher, Rolling Stones...as a 10 year old, that's not an enticing mix. But I was really into Paula Abdul at the time and Arsenio Hall was hosting and they were rumored to be together and even back then, my attention to gossip was strong, so I was very excited for her performance.

I tried and tried to learn those dance moves.

1991 was probably the most memorable. R.E.M. won award after award for "Losing My Religion", with Michael Stipe removing and revealing a different t-shirt each time they went up to accept their moon man, though Pee Wee Herman stole the show right off the bat, making his first public appearance after getting caught masturbating in a theater spouting the line: "Heard any good jokes lately?"

Bands like Metallica and Guns N' Roses and Van Halen still performed. Your pop stars were the likes of Mariah Carey and Paula Abdul. L.L. Cool J was THE rapper and this was as cheesy as it got:

Admittedly, this is very cheesy.

So what am I getting at?

Last night was the 2011 VMAs and this was the big winner:

Looking up this video and checking it out before posting is my first encounter with Katy Perry. Don't get me wrong, I've seen her all over the blogs. I know she's a good Christian girl who just happens to be married to Russell Brand.

But this is the video of the year? An auto-tuned mess of a song with a message about being a firework?

Okay, take away the song. This is the "video" music awards. Or excuse me, the VMAs (just like KFC, MTV can't false advertise anymore).

What is this video? Why is it the winner? I don't understand. There is nothing of interest happening here.

To put this in perspective, let's look at some of the past Video of the Year winners, shall we?

1984: The Cars - "You Might Think"

1986: Dire Straits - "Money for Nothing"

1990: Sinead O'Connor - "Nothing Compares 2 U"

1991: R.E.M. - "Losing My Religion"

1992: Van Halen - "Right Now"

1993: Pearl Jam - "Jeremy"

1994: Aerosmith - "Cryin"

1995: TLC - "Waterfalls"

1997: Jamiroquai - "Virtual Insanity"

1999: Lauryn Hill - "Doo Wop (That Thing)"

2003: Missy Elliot - "Work It"

2004: Outkast - "Hey Ya"

All iconic videos. Sure there have been a few duds along the way, but for the most part, the videos have been worthy winners.

So is the Katy Perry video a dud/mistake or a generational thing? It certainly doesn't seem like a mistake since people aren't shocked by the win. I mean, when Neil Young won way back when, people were stunned.

That makes me think it's a generational thing and I'm finally too old for this shit.

For example, I don't understand how this could be a heartthrob:

I know my Teen Idol was not exactly a snazzy dresser either:

But at least he had facial hair.

This is probably the first time where I've never heard the music of over 3/4 of the nominees and when I clicked on the red carpet pics this morning, I knew maybe a handful of names.

In the interest of trying to know what I'm talking about, I've explored some of these artists and all I can say again is...I don't get it.

I understand and like Lady GaGa. Britney Spears is a special gal and she has some fun songs. Beyonce is The Queen and nobody messes with her. Everybody likes Adele.

I can see why young girls like Katy Perry.

But...Justin Beiber? Kreayshawn??? LMFAO????? Fucking Chris Brown?????? Yes, let's hero worship the guy who beat his girlfriend to a bloody pulp. That will be a good lesson for everyone.

Even in my younger days, I appreciated the music that I may not have liked. I had friends who listened to Cannibal Corpse. Is it really just the music you're exposed to as a teen is the music that can do no wrong? Or is it what I really think which is popular music today really really sucks?

I'm going with the latter. Now get off my lawn.

Amy Winehouse

I recently added Amy Winehouse's song "Back to Black" to my karaoke repertoire. I love to sing along to her. I'd like to thank her for the songs she sung and wrote. My heart goes out to her family. It must be crushing to watch someone wilt away with no way of changing in the inevitable outcome.

September 14, 1983 - July 23, 2011

Thanks for the music.

Good Face

I’m kind of becoming obsessed with Adele’s face after seeing her photo spread in Out magazine. I don’t know if it’s just the way they style her make-up or her natural beauty and ability to give good face in photographs, but she is gorgeous.

I want someone to do my make-up like this.

She Can't Really Think This Looks Good

Why, Christina?

I mean, you're a beautiful girl...but you're orange. And the hair is...odd. And all of that make-up. Why?

Y Kant Tori Amos Pronounce Words Correctly Anymore?

Last night the song “Winter” by Tori Amos shuffled into my listening ears while I was playing another exciting game of Spider Solitaire via the AARP website . Great game. Anyway, I was struck by how amazing her vocals are. She is an amazing singer. Or, was an amazing singer. What happened?

It’s not that she’s lost her range, but she’s taken on this very strange accent when she sings. It’s like she’s forgotten how to say vowels. ‘O’ turns into ‘E’. ‘A turns into U’. It’s very very weird and ruins all new material from her. Unfortunately, it also ruins all live recordings of older songs, too.

I heard a live radio broadcast of “Silent All These Years” recently. It hurt my ears so much to hear her pronounce the chorus: “Sueeelent ooooll these yeeeers”. Who talks like that? It is irritating.

Then there is the recording I have of “1000 Oceans” – oh, wait, that’s now “1000 Eeeeesheeuns”. What the hell is an “eeeesheeun” and how do you get 1000 of them?

I don’t know why she’s chosen to speak/sing this way. I’ve heard a couple of her official boots where she is talking in some sort of strange British accent. I know she lives in London and is married to a Brit and maybe it’s the whole Madonna disease happening. Fine. I tend to pick up accents pretty easily when I’m around people with accents. But that still doesn’t explain the singing. She’s totally doing it on purpose and it is ruining her music. Do her fans really enjoy it? I know she has some serious fanaticals out there. Do you think they all run around talking like this now? Maybe it’s their own Tori Amos version of Klingon. I guess, for me, I’ll stick to the classic, album versions of her older songs.

Like, “Winter”. Which last night, totally hit me and I think is so beautiful and heartbreaking. I never gave the lyrics much thought before. It’s a gorgeous song. Give it a listen.

Yes, I Think You've Seen Him Before

Corey Haim died last night of an apparent drug overdose. He was 38 years old.

This is very sad to me. Corey Haim was a big part of my life as pre-teen. He was in The Lost Boys, for crying out loud! One of my most favorite movies ever. I think fondly now of him in that pastel trench coat walking through the Frog Brothers comic book store. Or screaming in fear as Jason Patric floats outside his window. And I still question why a teenage boy had a sexy picture of Rob Lowe in his bedroom. Was Corey Haim ahead of his time in wanting to play Sam as a gay teen?

Then there's License to Drive. The story of a 16 year old who just wants his license so he can ask the hot girl out on a date. And when he doesn't get it and steals his parent's car to take her out anway, well, let's just say that hilarity ensues.

And then there's Lucas. This was one of his first movies and people actually thought he'd be a serious actor. You wonder where the divide happened.

So, thanks, Corey, for The Lost Boys. I can't imagine anyone else in that role. And now I have the theme song stuck in my head. "Say you love a pretty night! (lost boys!) Lost in the shadows".

The Oscars

I saw quite a few movies last year. And good ones. Oscar contenders even. So I was quite surprised to see that in all the major catergories, I had only seen one winner. Christoph Walz took the Best Supporting Actor award for Inglorius Basterds. Deservedly so. I'm pretty sure that as soon as people saw that movie, there was no doubt he would win.

The other big winners of the night were The Hurt Locker (Best Picture, Best Original Screenplay), Precious (Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Supporting Actress), The Blind Side (Best Actress), and Crazy Heart (Best Actor).

I had wanted to see The Hurt Locker, but changed my mind after a scathing review from a co-worker. I've been meaning to see Precious, but that's a hard movie to go see. I'd have to want to be depressed and not care that I would be depressed for days after seeing it. So I haven't made it to that one yet.

I have no desire to see The Blind Side, even after I've been surprised by so many people who say it is actually a really good movie. It just seems like this is Sandra Bullock's Erin Brokovich. It just looks so very formulaic.

As for Crazy Heart, if Maggie Gyllenhaal wasn't in this movie, I would have seen it by now. I can't stand her. She just seems so stuck up. She is all the parts of New York that I don't like. She is cigarettes and french pronunciations. She is modern art and complicated scarves. She is only listening to vinyl and not owning a TV.

But I digress.

Having not seen the movie, I can't speak to Jeff Bridges' performance, though I'm sure it was fantastic. He's a great actor and should have been given the Oscar for The Big Lebowski, which makes this win seem like one of those "you're due" awards.

As for Sandra Bullock, this is a hard one to grasp. Yes, I haven't seen this movie either so maybe she was great. But like I said, it looks like she's playing Julia Roberts playing Erin Brokovich. I like Sandra Bullock. How can you not? She's very likeable. But I don't get the win. Of course, it was a pretty lame duck Best Actress category this year and they couldn't very well give it to Meryl Streep again.

One last thing: A shout-out to the Academy voters for keeping Avatar wins where they belong. In the special effects area. Hallelujah for not winning Best Picture. There's still hope yet for Hollywood.

Tiger Tiger Tiger Woods

Tiger Woods made his grand apology to us today for cheating on his wife. The whole thing is ridiculous. Why does he need to apologize to the public? What does cheating on his wife have to do with his golf capabilities? The guy is a fantastic golfer. That should be all anybody judges him on.

Oh, that's right. We must think of the children. Those poor, innocent kids that athletes are created to protect.

Well, unfortunately, this isn't even something kids should know about. For multiple reasons.

Reason 1. It's nobody's business. It's a non-story. It shouldn't have been reported on in the first place. This should always have been kept between Tiger and his wife.

Reason 2. Even if it's reported on, the kids don't need to know. Any child with the ability to read the paper or watch the news see things that are a lot worse than some athlete who cheats on his wife. Any child younger than that should have parents who can turn off the TV or take away the tabloid or maybe even sit down and talk to their kid and explain why some golfer should not be who they take their life lessons from. Sure, look up to his work ethic and how he got to be as good at golf as he is today. But he is not a role model for how to live your personal life.

And I say this all as someone who loves her celebrity blogs and US Weeklys. But that's because I'm a nosey gossip. And an adult. Who understands that whether Tiger stays faithful to his wife or not, has nothing to do with his golf skills. It's not like he was swallowing steroids all these years. Now that would be an issue. With his golfing abilities.

So, Tiger, I do not accept your apology. Because you don't owe me one.

Via Con Dios

Patrick Swayze died yesterday. Pancreatic Cancer. 57 years old.

I love Patrick Swayze.

You don't realize how cool Patrick Swayze is/was until you look back at his career. The man was in some classic, classic films. He is a pop culture icon. Just think of some of the lines he's brought to the world:

"Pain don't hurt" - Roadhouse
"Ditto" - Ghost
"If you want the ultimate, you've got to be willing to pay the ultimate price. It's not tragic to die doing what you love" - Point Break
"Now get up here and piss in the radiator" - Red Dawn

And of course...

"Nobody puts Baby in the corner" - Dirty Dancing

He starred in The Outsiders, Red Dawn, Roadhouse, Dirty Dancing, Ghost, Point Break....all culturally relevant movies.

Dirty Dancing was the first "dirty" movie I ever saw. I was 8 years old. I wanted to see it so bad, so my dad rented it for me. I remember hiding my face in my pillow during all of the suggestive dancing.

He also starred in one of the top 5 greatest Saturday Night Live skits of all time:



I will raise my glass in a toast to Mr. Swayze. Thank you for the entertainment.

And I hope you all have a very Swayze Christmas....

Tweet

Twitter is a crazy thing.

I held off on joining for so long. My social networking started out with MySpace. Then that got old and crowded and spammed, so I ended on Facebook and still enjoy my time there very much. But, Twitter just looked so dull. Just status updates and the occasional "twitpic". There didn't seem to be much social interaction to be had.

For whatever reason, though, I decided to join recently. I think it was mainly just to see what it was all about.

It's very strange.

For the shamefully open celebrity obsessed person like myself, it's a crazy cyberworld. With just a click of the follow button, I can see what the likes of Courtney Love, Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore, Scott Baio, and Jessica Alba are all doing at any given time. Do I normally give a shit about these people? No. But I just find it fascinating to see these little snippets of the celebrity lifestyle played out in real time. I can't even begin to tell you why. I think it's my nosey nature. I work in HR for a reason.

Sure, most of them just use it at as an advertising tool, relentlessly pushing their latest album, concert tour, movie premiere, or cause (Yoko Ono, I'm looking at you). But some, take Lindsay Lohan for example, display their entire lives via 140 character messages at a time. Arguments between her and girlfriend Samantha Ronson play out in real time over the internet.

Just yesterday, Courtney Love went on a tweeting rampage over the use of Kurt Cobain's image in the new Guitar Hero game. Being attacked by "Followers", she responded in depth to all of the legal battles surrounding Kurt's estate and was not shy in damning former Nirvana bandmates, Dave Grohl and Krist Noveselic.

As a private person (funny, considering how nosey I am) I am surprised by all of these celebrities who do live their lives openly on a social networking site. I could not imagine my husband and I having an open argument on Facebook or Twitter. Or expounding on Twitter all of my legal and financial woes.

But that's just me.

On the other hand, when you find a celebrity you do feel fondly for and can openly engage with someone you admire, it makes it a truly wonderful site. When Erin McKeown or Ingrid Michaelson twitter and tweet and respond to twitters and tweets from their fans, it really makes you feel connected to the artist and makes the world feel like a smaller, closer place.

Social, Demented and Sad, But Social

In honor of the passing of John Hughes yesterday, a question was poised in the office to name your top 10 John Hughes movies.

So here's mine:

1. The Breakfast Club
2. Pretty In Pink
3. Planes, Trains, and Automobiles
4. Uncle Buck
5. Sixteen Candles
6. Vacation
7. Some Kind of Wonderful
8. Christmas Vacation
9. Weird Science
10. She's Having a Baby

What are yours?