Friday, August 14, 2009

Turn Into

Just one week left and then I will turn 30. I was reading a blog article online about aging and turning 30 and how people say you "turn 30" like milk turns sour. I thought that was very fitting.

Not that I think I'm souring. But there is an expiration date that comes with 30. There are a lot of things that you just don't/shouldn't do anymore. It really is the official age of adulthood. When I was 18, I was nowhere near an adult. But now, I can't physically stay out past 2am drinking and living it up. My body can't handle it.

I haven't stayed up all night to watch the sun rise in years.

There's also more serious issues. I've never wanted a baby. But now that I'm "turning" 30, I beginning to really ponder the idea of motherhood as the years that I will be able to have a baby are slipping by so very quickly. I don't want to be a new mother when I'm 40. But, do I want to be a mother at all?

I'm turning 30 and I don't have a good retirement plan. I have no 401(k) or 403(b). I have $40 in my savings account.

I'm still living with the idea that I have all the time in the world. I can always go back to school, right? I still have time to be a rock star, right? I'm not going to be an administrative assistant forever, right?

Everyone keeps telling me that being in your 30s is the best time of your life. But, growing up, everyone told me high school was the greatest time of your life. They were wrong about that. Then it was your 20s are the most wonderful. Yes, they've been good, but they've also been really difficult.

So, maybe I should trust my over 30 friends and know that 30 is where it's at. They all seem happy and very sure of themselves.

But, at the same time, not one of them let's me complain about turning 30. They all give me the stank eye and tell me I'm still so young. So, is it really that great?

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