Bridesmaids

I like stupid comedies. I also can enjoy a simple romantic comedy. I am not a very picky movie viewer, at least I don’t think so. I don’t see a lot of movies, because in general, movies aren’t my thing. I’m a music gal and I’ll spend $10 on a new CD than $10 to get into a movie.

I will say that I am not a Kristin Wiig fan. In fact, she might be one of my least favorite TV/movie star persons out there right now, so really, I should have known better with Bridesmaids. Which is also why it took me until this past weekend to finally see it.

I had heard it called “The Hangover with women” and that is was super super funny and everyone should see it because it is the funniest thing since funny became a thing.

I really really liked The Hangover.

I hated Bridesmaids.

Let’s start with the basics: The title. 

This movie is called Bridesmaids. On the cover of the DVD box and on all of the movie posters, you see the 5 bridesmaids and the bride, played by Maya Rudolph. You think, oh, this is an ensemble cast. But you would be wrong. The movie is 2 hours of Kristin Wiig living a shitty life and blaming everyone else around her for it and then destroying her best friend since childhood’s various wedding events in non-humorous ways.

Kristin plays Annie, a single 30-something whose bakery recently went out of business and whose boyfriend left her. She lost her apartment and now rooms with a British brother and sister who really serve absolutely no point in the movie except that, I don’t know, we’re supposed to laugh at them because they are weird and gross and British and maybe a little incestual? I don’t know.

Her best friend, Lilian (played by Maya Rudolph), just got engaged. So, basically her life is perfect because she found a man or something. And not just any man, a rich man with rich friends.  Meanwhile, Annie is sleeping with a dude (played by John Hamm) who just sleeps with her and then asks her to leave. But, yet, she keeps going back because, you know, she is scared of commitment or thinks poorly of herself or whatever. I don’t know. When Annie heads to the engagement party held at some lavish destination and meets Lilian’s new rich friend, Helen, well, she just can’t stand it. I mean, her BEST FRIEND is HAPPY…WITHOUT HER. And even though her BEST FRIEND asked her to be the Maid of Honor, you can understand why she would feel the need to only think of herself and let her crazy jealousy of her friend’s new life completely destroy the fun and happiness her friend is supposed to be having.

This is the whole movie.

Sure, there are other bridesmaids. They make an appearance here and there. There is the awesome bridesmaid, Megan, played by Melissa McCarthy, you know, the one who got the Oscar nomination for this – she is really good and is definitely the best part of the whole movie.

When they would let you in on the brief glimpses and conversations of the rest of the bridesmaids, the movie was entertaining. And if they would have stuck with this and really made an ensemble comedy about crazy wedding planning, then this movie could have been very funny.

Instead, it’s a vehicle for Kristin Wiig to pity herself for 120 minutes and that got old really fast.

It makes me sad that women flocked to this and talked it up and oh my god finally a comedy for us ladies. Ugh. Gross. If this is what women are really like or what they relate to or what they strive to be…there is something seriously wrong.

I know we are meeting Annie at her lowest and most everyone has had a low point in their lives and that this is what we are supposed to be relating to. But she is an awful person. 100% self-centered, catty, immediately dislikes her best friend’s new friend because she is rich and pretty, as if that is a reason to automatically hate someone. Not once giving her a chance.

And it’s not that Helen is not a fault. She automatically dislikes Annie because she wanted to be the Maid of Honor.

It’s all just so stupid. Who cares?

To me, it was a movie filled with women being completely stereotypical and barely being funny. There are so many ways they could have gone with this.

At one point they are headed to Vegas for the Bachelorette party and I thought, okay, here we go. Hilarity is about to ensue.

But, nope. Annie gets drunk and they have to turn the flight around. I watched that thinking, what, did they not have the budget to shoot in Vegas? Really? That’s it. And then, so just because Vegas got cancelled, there is never a bachelorette party? They couldn’t go to the bar?

The movie is filled with missed opportunities. Instead it is filled with Annie’s unfunny self-loathing which you can’t even feel bad for her for. She, of course, gets a love interest and a bunch of stupid stuff happens with him  and then in the end (SPOILER – though this a romantic comedy so you can probably guess what happens) when he forgives her and shows up, I had completely forgotten about him and that story line and the movie could have ended without ever resolving it and I wouldn’t have noticed.

Maybe I’m just not girly enough for this flick. But, I liked Sex and the City, so, it’s not like I can’t enjoy super-girly stuff. It just seemed like the only characters that I liked were Megan and the two other bridesmaids who were in the movie so briefly that I don’t even know their names.

Oh, and there are montages of Annie baking cakes and stuff. Really, fascinating stuff here.