Lyric Of The Day

"gonna rise up
find my direction magnetically
gonna rise up
throw down my ace in the hole"

-from "Rise" by Eddie Vedder

I've Got Bruises On My Chin For You

Take a look just to the bottom right of my lower lip.

Ignore the dark bag under my eye. I'm very tired.

See that odd discoloration? That is the bruise that caused the awful dream I had Wednesday night. Sure, it's not big and purple. But it's still unfortunate and in a spot just bad enough where it looks like I'm walking around with food on my face. Or dirt. And it really looks much more vibrant in person.

I have no idea where it came from. The only thing I can think of is that I tend to sit at the computer with my chin cupped in my hand and that is the exact spot where my thumb rests. Maybe my iron levels are low and I am bruising easily again. Being that I'm a vegetarian (and a very bad one in that I don't eat enough veggies for being a vegetarian), I don't get enough iron in my diet. When I first stopped eating meat, I bruised if someone brushed up against me. I recall walking around one summer with my arms covered in little bruises. I looked like a domestic abuse victim, or a junkie.

But over 13 years on, I've figured out how to be a proper vegetarian. But this holiday season and being sick and sad for the past month has caused me to eat very poorly - and obviously my body is starting to show it in a variety of ways.

Like random bruises.

Dream Log #11

Back story: Yesterday I got home from work and noticed a small bruise on my face. I have no idea how it got there. I think this is where the crazy dream came from.

I was getting ready to go out. I noticed the bruise on my face. My husband and I were really looking forward to the party we were planning to attend. I didn't worry about the bruise too much, but still thought I should try to cover it with make-up. As I was applying the foundation, I noticed a ridge on my face running from the bottom of my eye to my chin. It almost looked like a fish gill. It was only noticeable close up. I applied more make-up, and after freaking out for a bit, decided not to let it get to me. It was just a party with friends, after all.

I finished with the make-up, went to get dressed, and went back to the bathroom to doublecheck my hair. I gasped. On my face, running from the outer corner of my eye to my nostrils was a huge gash. If I pushed on it, you could see the muscle underneath. I screamed and cried for my Husband. He repeated, "It's not that bad. It's not that bad." But it was, it really was.

I cried for a while. Then pulled myself together, put some gauze and a bandage over the gash, reapplied some make-up over the rest of the facial issues, threw on some large sunglasses (which helped to cover the gash), and went to the party.

The Three Shows I Will End Up Watching Over And Over Again

While I was sick last weekend, I decided to - once again - watch Arrested Development. All three seasons. I do this every few months.

I canceled my cable in September 2010. I never really watched a lot of television anymore and just could not stomach the massive cost to keep cable. And, really, if I like a show enough, I end up buying it on DVD anyway. And any new show usually offers a sneak peak online or a quick download on iTunes the day after airing. Why pay $150 a month on 100 channels that either are all showing Back to the Future marathons (which I own - all three movies) when I can use that money to buy programming that I actually want to watch.

So that's what I did.

And I love it.

But what I've found is that I haven't sought out new television as much as I thought. I watch Community, How I Met Your Mother, and Modern Family all during their regular time slots because they are on basic television. I download The Walking Dead from iTunes the day after it airs. And I am waiting and waiting for the BBC Sherlock Holmes return to air on PBS in the states (not until May!).

But other than that, I keep it simple. And that's by watching the same three shows on DVD over and over again. They are:

1. Arrested Development



This one is so easy. I adore this show and I've probably seen it, oh man, I can't even begin to imagine how many times I've watched all three seasons. Sometimes I skip around, but usually I put in disc 1 of season 1 and slowly make my way through. It's great because it is only 3 seasons long, it wraps up really nicely, and there is always something new to discover. The show was brilliant with its inside jokes and subtlety that there are things I still catch for the first time even after seeing it so many times. I mean, they'd been building up Buster's missing hand since season 1. That's good writing.




2. It's Alway Sunny in Philadelphia

This show is on its 7th season. For the longest time I only had the first 3 seasons on DVD and the rest  were on iTunes. But, I can only watch TV for so long on the computer, so I bought the rest on DVD...still downloading the new episodes as they were made available so I could keep up.  This show is not for everyone. It can be very crude. There is swearing. But it is fucking hilarious.



3. Community

Oh, Community. I love you so much. This show makes me so happy. It's the newest of the three and so it still has that freshness to it. But I just started season 1 yesterday for the 4th time and it's still just as good as ever. I just sit there with a permanent smile on my face in total bliss. And NBC is looking to cancel it. Please start watching this show. Go get season 1 on DVD. I will admit, the first 5 episodes of season 1, while entertaining, may not jump at you. But like any new show, once it hits its groove, it so good. So good. So so so so good. Really really good.

And with that, I'm off to watch more Community.

Lyric Of The Day

"it's nice to be important
but so close to being despised
it's more important to be nice
I guess, than being wise"

-from "4 Chords of the Apocalypse" by Julian Casablancas

Vacation Days

Lake Michigan

Being on vacation is weird. And, technically, I'm not even on vacation. I don't really have a job. I have a temporary assignment that could end at any time and then I will be back "on vacation" again.

But I've been on real vacations before. A week where you take the time off of work and go somewhere (or stay home) all while still being paid. It's a wonderful time. And I always sit there in the midst of it thinking, why don't I do this all the time?

Oh, yeah. Money.

It's funny how quickly you can forget about that piece of it. You're sitting there, doing nothing and having a blast doing it and reveling in the loveliness of not having anything to do or anyone to answer to and you think, how do I make this happen all the time?

This is why so many people waste their only dollars on lottery tickets.

I've been sick for most of my vacation this past week, yet it still beats getting up in the morning before it is light out, getting all dressed up, and sitting at a desk for 8 hours - even though I just get up and sit my desk at home for pretty much the same time. But I get to do what I want. I can stop when I want. I can pick up my guitar when the mood strikes me. I can decide to go do yoga at 11am. I can dance around my living room when a really good song comes on the iPod. I can go to any site on the internet without having to watch over my shoulder should someone be standing there while I read through some less than appropriate article on Fark.

And I still work.

I post to this blog, I update my website, I write songs, I record demos, I practice, I work on show posters, I contact venues and other artists about shows....and maybe none of this seems like real "work", but it is. It's my second job. If I don't do these things, then for sure nothing will happen with anything related to my music.

And I can easily spend 8 hours a day doing these things.

So what's the point to this rambling?

I guess it just goes back to my whole thing about finding work doing something that doesn't feel like work. So that most days feel like the one I'm having right now (well, not right now as I'm still sick and feel kind of cruddy).

So, I look to this post on Unicorns for Socialism: 7 Questions to Ask When You're Not Sure Who You're Becoming. And I can see the answers. I know what they are. And I want to make them happen.

So that everyday is a vacation day.

2012

Happy New Year! 2012 is here. 2011 is just a really bad memory. Time to move on and stay positive.

I admit I was sad about being sick on New Years and not being able to go out and celebrate. But the Husband and I stayed in and played video games (we beat Zelda: Ocarina of Time and started Zelda: The Wind Waker), had a nice dinner, and I still managed to stay up until midnight even though I was feeling very feverish and gross.

But this morning I woke up and discovered a container full of these rolo/pretzel treats that I love on my doorstep. A friend of mine dropped them off this morning. It was so sweet and thoughtful and just really started this year off right. This is what I mean when I say I want to be a better friend to my friends. Because I have some really amazing people in my life and nothing feels better than to know that someone was thinking of you. And I want my friends to know how much they mean to me.

So, once again, Happy New Year!