Get Ready

I'm making it my goal in June to post something every day, no matter how mundane. I've been seriously slacking on this blog and I need to get on a roll again.

Maybe I'll write the post of a lifetime. Or maybe I'll bore you to tears. You'll just have to wait and see.

In honor of this, here is a video by Regina Spektor. Enjoy.

Happy Memorial Day

It seems weird to say "Happy" Memorial Day, doesn't it? It's not really supposed to be a happy day. I mean this:

is what we're supposed to be remembering.

But really, what it is, is this:

So pull out the grill and start remembering and have a "happy" day.

Soundset

I spent my afternoon at Soundset, the local hip hop festival. Yes, Minnesota has a hip hop festival. We actually have an amazing hip hop scene here led by the folks at Rhymesayers, containing such acts as Atmosphere and P.O.S..

The weather was cold and rainy. It kind of put a damper on things. I also ate some, what I thought, was undercooked pizza that left my stomach rumbling. We ended up leaving early.

But, we did get to see P.O.S.. He is really amazing. Smart lyrics, live band...he's almost punk rock in his sound. I highly recommend you pick up his album Never Better. It is so good. At the very least check out his song "Purexed". It gives me the chills every time, its so good.

I will say I was disappointed by the amount of litter everywhere. They could have done a better job with containing the garbage. Maybe hire a green team next time?

I don't know if I'd go again next year. I can take Hip Hop in doses, but the constant bass got to me after a while. It's not really my scene. Except for P.O.S.. He makes me happy.

There Is A Crack In Everything

A beautiful Memorial Weekend is upon us. I had to take the day off work today to get a new central air unit installed. Our old one finally quit us. The first guy to start the installation, showed up at 8am. He left about 20 minutes later and said someone else will be here "around noon" to finish the job. WTF? The next guy showed up at 1:30. He's still here. He's making a lot of noise. I've had to sit here all day waiting and waiting and waiting for these people. I've got nothing done. What a wasted day.

In the midst of all this, I discovered this on my kitchen floor:

This is the same kitchen floor that I just had installed less than a year ago. This did not help make my day any better.

Luckily, I had 20 minutes to run to Menards to see if they still have this tile, and they did. So I've got replacement tile. Now I just need someone to fix it.

Every so often, I seem to go through a real unluckly patch of time. I really hope things aren't headed that way again.

AI Season 9

Another season of American Idol is over. It was brutal. BRUTAL. There was only one good contestant the entire season, and she came in second.



The American Idol confetti shower was given to Lee DeWyze this year.



He seems nice enough. But it's not a competition about who's the nicest. If this were any other season, and I'm including the beginning of this downward spiral that started last season, he would have been maybe an 8th place finisher. Because, let's face it, the guy can't sing. He barely sang on key the entire season. He can growl and yell through a song - and sometimes that works. But he can't actually sing.

I'm not someone who listens to music for pretty vocals. I will take emotion and grit over an angelic falsetto any day. But, American Idol is a singing competition. And Lee can't sing.

In all honesty, though, it seems fitting that the wrong contestant won. It was an abysmal season. Each contestant was a dud. No one showed any star power, much less captivating vocal talent. The only who came close was Ms. Crystal Bowersox. But, I'm not going to pick up the Melissa Ethridige 2.0 album we are due to get.

Couple all of those vocal atrocities with the obvious amount of disinterest held by top judge Simon Cowell and how could anyone watch this shit anymore? Oh, yeah. I did. But I have no will power. I get sucked into things easily. But once they got down to the final three, I stopped. I checked out the finale last night on and off, but I hadn't watched an episode in about 3 weeks.

And what a finale. Lee's win makes it obvious that tween girls are the main watchers and voters of this program. So why fill the night with aging adult contemporary artists like the Bee Gees, and Hall and Oates, and Joe Cocker, and Chicago. Chicago! What is wrong with this show?



Thankfully, this season was so utterly dull that I know I will never watch it again. In fact, with Lost over, I am going to try to cut out as much TV as I can. The only shows that I watch now are Project Runway, How I Met Your Mother, Community, and Modern Family. That's manageable.

And In The End...

It's been a while since my last post. A lot has happened. So much that I wish I would have written about, but I just couldn't find the time. But I couldn't pass on this one.

Lost ended last night. And though my recaps have become a bit sloppy or absent all together, I still love this show. It's just that,as the end approached, it just all got so...thick. It was/is almost impossible to try to piece it all together or break it all down. So, I'm not going to try. Last night was two and a half hours of incredible television and all I can do is just give my opinion on it like the rest of the internet is doing right now.

First off, this is an ending you will either love or hate and it will depend on why you watched the show. There really weren't any answers given, at least not to the long standing "must answer" questions. Because, really, do they really matter? As this show wound down, I found myself consistently disappointed with the answers that were given and they way they were given. Everything was so blunt, and this show has never been blunt. Did you really want some person/being to sit down the cast and tell them: Walt is special because of the following traits....The Island needed him because....Now let's move on to Chapter 2 where we discuss why The Island could disappear....

No. No one really wants that. And not truly resolving those things does not mean that none of it mattered. Walt mattered, at a time. And then he didn't. The Island was done with him. And he got to go home.

And can't we all just rest on the idea that The Island is just a crazy place? One of those weird spots on Earth where crazy things happen? Do we really need a scientific explanation for all of it?

As I watched last night, and the realization kicked in that this was not going to be about answers, I realized I didn't care. Because what it was all about, was the characters. It's always been about that. All those episodes of complaining about how I don't give a shit about who Kate is going to pick, well it turns out I did. Because, very surprising to me, when she and Jack said goodbye on that cliff, I cried. I didn't cry for Jin and Sun. But I did cry for Jack and Kate. What the hell.

Now, I'm not saying the ending was perfect. It was a little too "Christian Shepherd" for me. It still got me at the moment, but looking back now, I am a little skived by the whole thing.

I do find it somewhat funny that the writers who have denied that The Island is purgatory for 6 seasons, still found a way to get around that denial. Sure, The Island wasn't purgatory, but the Sideways World kind of was. The Losties still had to find some sort of redemption before they could all go to heaven. It's odd that it was a world they all created for themselves to meet up in once they all died. Was that really their ideal world? Or am I missing something? Ideally, did Jack really want to be with Juliette, but only for long enough to have a kid with her and then get divorced? Did Kate really still want to be on the run? Charlie still wanted to be a junkie? Sayid wanted Nadiya to be with his brother? Actually, that one kind of made sense. As it turned out, Sayid's true love was not Nadiya, but Shannon. Who would have thought?

It's interesting to see what triggered everyone's memories. Most people had to couple up. Except for John, who got his legs back, and Jack, who found his father. Oh, and Ben, who had to get the crap beaten out of him. Poor Ben.

It was certainly an ending filled with tears. I cried often. I cried when Claire and Charlie were reunited. I cried when Sawyer and Juliette found each other. I cried when Locke got up and walked. I cried when Jack hugged his dad. I cried when Kate and Jack said their goodbyes. I cried when Hurley saw Charlie again. I cried when Hurley realized Jack was going to die going down into The Light. And, I cried, oh boy did I cry, when Vincent curled up next to a dying Jack in the end. A cheap ploy for tears? Sure. But it works. It works every time.

So what does it all mean?

Who knows? I've been reading about people complaining that Dharma really never meant anything, that The Temple was pointless, that Smokey and Jacob were a waste of time, that it was all really pointless. But you can't just have a show about a plane crash on a crazy Island and then one episode in have Jacob come out of the woods and tell everyone what's going on. There has to be a story. And there was. And Dharma and The Temple and Widmore and Richard and Jacob and NotFBIChick and all of them all helped to tell that story.

You could venture to guess that when Richard finally died, he went off to his own ideal world. He wasn't at the church with the rest of them. Maybe Ben is not meant to go off with our Losties. He was with Dharma and Richard and Rosseau and Alex. That is who he is connected to and why he didn't join the Losties in their departure. Just because we focused on our initial survivors doesn't mean that everyone else we've met through the years didn't serve their own purpose or have their own story to tell.

And, speaking of Richard, what do you think he did when they finally reached normal land? Here is a guy from a long long time ago met with a new world he's only had little tastes of. It must have been pretty insane.

I've also been thinking about how long they all had to wait to meet again. Note Kate's mention to Jack that she has missed him for so long. Note Hurley and Ben's mention of the teamwork they had during their run protecting The Island. What crazy adventures did Hurley and Ben have? Did they have their own Oceanic 6? I like to think Hurley would have been very up front with new visitors to The Island.

So how long was it? Assuming most of them lived a normal life, maybe 50 years. But then, what if Hurley and Ben protected The Island for thousands of years? Kind of crazy to think about.

All of their deaths happened. Everything we saw on The Island was real. When Jughead went off, it didn't make an alternate timeline. It simply propelled everyone to present day, but they were always still stuck on The Island. Everything went on as we saw. Kate, Sawyer, Claire, Miles, Richard, and The Pilot all flew off The Island and lived their lives. We don't know what they did or how they spent it, but they all got away.

Hurley and Ben spent an unknown amount of time protecting The Island.

Jack died as we saw him die. Lying where he originally landed with a very precious Vincent curled up next to him (that still chokes me up).

We can assume Rose, Bernard, and Vincent lived out their days on The Island.

It seems that Daniel and Charlotte were not meant to head for the afterlife at this time. Desmond even told Eloise that Daniel was not coming with him. I believe that that "purgatory" world kept on with these outlying characters until they were ready to go. Daniel continued his music career. Ben and Rosseau and Alex built a life together.

Everyone and Everything had a purpose. None of it was in vain. The Island is still a very important and powerful place and is still being protected and most likely new visitors are coming and going and the cycle continues.

There are a lot of things that we will focus on as we rewatch the series as a whole. There will be a lot of things that maybe won't make sense at all. A lot of pieces that won't fit. But one that that has stayed consistent, is the characters. And, in the end, that's what this show was about.

Lost, The Final Season, Episode 14, "Across The Sea"

Let's just get this out of the way: I did not enjoy last night's episode. After the insanity that was "The Candidate", this just seemed like a poor follow up. It's not that I was expecting explosions and non-stop action, I knew what the episode was about going in, I just felt it was executed poorly. To begin with: Allison Janney? Really? I love Allison Janney on the West Wing. I loved her in Drop Dead Gorgeous. I think she's a great actress. But not for this role. She completely took me out of it.

Allison played the fake mother to our Jacob and Smokey. She had been living alone on The Island for, what I assume are many many years when a pregnant woman washed ashore. Allison brought her back to her camp and helped her birth her two children. The first born, Jacob, was named by his birth mother. Smokey was a surprise and the mother was not prepared to name a second child, so she didn't. Allison saw the opportunity to have these heirs to her title of Island Protector and promptly smashed their birth mother in the head with a rock.

She raised the two boys to believe there is nothing beyond The Island and to fear any other people that might show up. She tells Smokey he is very special, but doesn't say why. While chasing a boar through the jungle one day, the boys stumbled upon other people. A group of men, They hid and watched as the men killed the boar. They ran back to tell Allison. She decided it was time to tell them the "truth". She brought them, blindfolded, to a mysterious cavern on The Island. On the way, she tells them that they are meant to be there and that the people will hurt them. She tells them she has made it so Jacob and Smokey can never hurt each other. They get to the cavern, It is surrounded by a pool of water. Inside it glowed bright yellow. She called it The Light. And there was a piece of the Light in every man. But most men are evil and want more Light than they can have. So she has to protect it. And now, so do the boys. The men on The Island will try to get to The Light and take it and if they do, very bad things will happen.

At one point, young Smokey (he hasn't actually become Smokey yet, but since he doesn't have a name, I have nothing to call him but Smokey) stumbles upon a game on the beach. It is a box with squares on it. Inside are black and white rocks. He shows it to Jacob and they begin to play. Jacob says Smokey is making up the rules. He says he just knows what they are because he is special. While playing, Smokey sees a woman. He gets up to follow her. She leads him to the other side of The Island where the men who killed the boar live. She tells him that she is his mother and that Allison killed her after she gave birth. She tells him that the people at the camp are his people and he belongs with them. He asks her why Jacob can't see her and she says it's because she is dead. Smokey takes that explanation as is and decides to leave Jacob and Allison and join his people. He tries to get Jacob to come along with him, but Jacob doesn't want to go. He doesn't want to hear bad things about Allison and starts to beat up Smokey. Allison breaks them up and begs Smokey not to leave, but he still does.

Flash forward 30 years later. Smokey is still living amongst his people on The Island trying to find a way off of it. Jacob is still living with his fake mother. They meet regularly to play their game of Backgammon. Smokey tells Jacob he's found a way to leave. Jacob, who is now the whiniest 30 something I've ever seen, still believes there is nothing beyond The Island and that he has to protect the glowing cave of Light. He runs home to tell Allison the Smokey is getting off The Island. He cries to her about she always loved Smokey more. She says that's not true, then runs off to find Smokey. She finds him in a well. The same well the holds - what will become - the Frozen Donkey Wheel. The FDW is not yet complete or frozen. But Smokey has somehow figured out, with the help of his people, that if he creates some sort of friction with The Light, it will transport him out of there. He said he has been searching for The Light and has ran all over The Island but could not find it. That is when he decided to go underneath The Island and that is when he found it and now he is going to leave. She goes to give him one last hug goodbye and then smashes his head against the wall. He passes out.

She runs to Jacob and tells him it's time. She brings him back to The Light and tells him it's now his turn to be The Island Protector. He tells her he doesn't want to, but she says he has no choice. She pulls out a bottle of "wine" and pours a glass. This is the same bottle Jacob has Richard drink from much later. She tells Jacob to drink from the glass. She tells him to never enter The Light. He asks if he will die if he does? She said no, but he will become something much worse than dead. He drinks from the glass. She says they are now one.

Jacob runs off to get firewood for the night and Allison heads back to camp. Smokey sneaks up on her and stabs her from behind. She says she's sorry and then she thanks him for killing her.

Jacob returns and freaks out. He attacks Smokey and drags him back to The Light. They fight and Jacob tosses him in the water. Smokey floats down stream and right into The Light. Then it gets quiet. Then it gets loud and out of The Light shoots the actual Smoke Monster - clicks, clacks, flashing lights and all. It shoots past Jacob and into the sky. Jacob pees his pants. Well, not really. But I bet he did. He's just so whiney.

On his way back to camp, he sees brother Smokey' s body in the trees, dead. He feels terrible and carries him back to camp. He places Smokey's body in the cave along with Allison's. He puts the black and white rocks from the game into a bag and places it into her hand. And now we know the origin of our Adam and Eve. And, just in case we completely forgot about this particular mystery, The Powers That Be decided to shove it in our face by cutting this scene with the scene from the first season where Jack and the gang discover the bodies. What they didn't show is Jack estimating the bodies to be at least 50 years old. A bit off there. Which brings me to the end of the episode and another question/issue I have with this particular episode: When the hell was it? There was zero reference to time in this episode and it really through me off, along with many other aspects. Let's take a look at those.

1. A clue as to the time period this episode landed in would have been helpful.

One thing of note is that there wasn't a single shot of the statue. Or any Egyptian like items anywhere. Yet, in modern times, we have this humongous statue with hieroglyphics lining the inside. We have the Temple with hieroglyphics inside. When did they get here? I have a theory about that, and I'll get to it soon.

2. Suddenly everyone speaks English.

I was completely taken out of this episode right from the start when out of nowhere Allison and Birth Mother switched to English. It made no sense. I tried to throw up some theory about how the mix Allison was making in the bowl and fed to Birth Mother is the same mix Locke gave to Boone and it made him hallucinate back in season 1 and that maybe it also made it so Birth Mother could speak English, but that was just me grasping at straws to try to make some sense of it. This show spent a whole episode just a few episodes ago entirely in Spanish. Subtitles are obviously not an issue. Why the change of heart?

3. Lowest Common Denominator

From the switching to English to that final cut scene, it really felt that the writers decided they had to cater to the lowest common denominator who watches the show. Why they felt, just three episodes from the end, that now is the time to do that, I'll never know. Everything was spoken so slowly and plainly (and in English). Shoving the "This is Adam and Eve!!!!OMG!!!!11111" scene in at the end just made me feel stupid. We all knew that. We figured that out. Hell, you just had a scene not a couple of episodes ago where Hurley was talking about them, so they were fresh in our minds. Why did they feel the need to shove it down our throats? It was like they were trying to prove a point about how they had it planned all along, even though there are inconsistencies with that story and they could have made Adam and Eve anyone and fit it into the story line at any point.

4. Smokey Is Evil. Don't Forget.

Last episode they made it very VERY clear that Smokey is an asshole. So, why this sudden turn around where they make you feel sorry for him? I suppose we are to say that Smokey is not Jacob's brother, he just lived in his form until recently when he took Locke's body. Sure, okay. I buy it. BUT, Jacob seems to communicate with him/it as his brother. And if Smokey is not actually his brother, but just looks like him, why couldn't Smokey just kill Jacob? Allison only made it so Jacob and his brother couldn't kill each other. So you'd think Smokey could do what it wanted.

AND, on a similar subject, we have always been told Dead is Dead. And just a few episodes ago, UnLocke/Smokey told Jack that he is the one who has appeared as all the walking/talking dead people on the show. Yet, this episode made it seem that Smokey had been trapped in that cave until Jacob went and screwed it up. So, how was it that Birth Mother appeared to Jacob's brother? That just doesn't make sense. Unless it's just that Jacob's brother is special like how Hurley is special. That I can also buy.

5. Jacob

Apparently Jacob is some stunted man child. Some 40 year old dork who would be equal to some freak who has lived in his mother's basement all his life. What an idiot. They basically made him just slightly above retarded. He was Forrest Gump. He is a disappointment.

Question and Theory Time!

With only 3 hours left of Lost, one would believe that theories one might have would be correct. The show has given us so much already that we should be piecing it all together and these final hours will just exist to wrap it all up. But, somehow, I know this is not so. But let's try it anyway.

1. Babies

Is it possible that, due to the tragedy that befell their birth mother, that Jacob and Smokey have somehow made it impossible for women to give birth on The Island. Maybe they are concerned for the innocence of life - after what happened to them - and would not want to be tempted into taking those babies and making them their new heirs to The Island Protector throne. Maybe that's why Jacob keeps bringing other people to The Island to test them. But, I guess that wouldn't explain why he enters the lives of Kate and Sawyer when they are children.

2. Smokey's origins

It would seem that Smokey was unleashed when Jacob threw his brother into the cave. Allison seemed to know that something like this would happen. Why and How? Could it be that by throwing his brother into The Light while he was filled with anger it made Smokey evil? Is Smokey all the evilness of a soul? Obviously the Dark to The Light. The judgement center. The Light is maybe the belief in everyone's goodness, while Smokey is a judger who believes everyone has evil inside them that is stronger than The Light. And when Jacob and his NotBrother are sitting on the beach discussing their plans, that Jacob brings people to The Island to prove they are good and Smokey just proves that Jacob is wrong. Maybe Jacob needs to find a truly good soul because that will be what it takes to get rid of Smokey. And maybe that good soul is Desmond? Maybe Desmond can send Smokey back to The Light and then Jacob can finally hand the reigns of Protector over to Jack?

Also, who killed all those men from the Birth Mother's ship. It certainly looked like the job of Smokey. But if Smokey was locked away, then who did it? Was it really Allison? Is she that superhuman?

3. The Candidates

When Birth Mother first bore Jacob, Allison didn't seem too interested. But when the second one came, that was when something seemed to click. Could it be that not just one Candidate is needed, but two? One to take over the Protector role, and one to kill the former Protector? I don't know what the point of that would be, but it seems this show is all about pairs. Maybe Jacob wanted Walt and Aaron. Maybe that's why they don't mean anything anymore because they are no longer together. Maybe that's why there was Ben AND Richard. Jack AND Locke.

4. Time Travel/Egyptian References

So, as I said, my big beef with the episode was not having an established time frame to view it in. The only clue I could think of was the well. So let's start there.

-When Locke descended into the well to turn the Frozen Donkey Wheel, it was during the The Island's time skipping days. It was fully formed and open. The Orchid Station was built, so we can assume it was post - Dharma. So sometime between the late 1970s and present day.

-During his descent, time shifts, and the well disappears completely. It's just ground. Sawyer is left holding a rope that is attached to the ground. After last night's episode, this would make me believe that they had skipped to a time pre-Jacob's Island birth.

-Then time shifts again. This time there is a well, but it is filled in with dirt. This makes me believe that they have shifted to a time post-Jacob becoming Island Protector, but pre-Dharma. We also see the fully formed statue for the first time.

So, What does it all mean? How the hell should I know? What I think happened is that at some point after Smokey is unleashed, someone gets that Frozen Donkey Wheel together and turns it. This causes The Island to begin its time travel. Maybe at some point it travels and lands somewhere near Egypt in ancient Egyptian times and they inhabit The Island and find it to be a sacred place. They live there and build statues and temples and then it flashes in time again and ends up somewhere else. Eventually, at some other point, someone had to go down and turn the FDW again to stop the time from skipping. And maybe at this point, they also froze it. Maybe that's when Jacob left The Island to go recruit Candidates. Because, how else does Jacob get on and off The Island?

I know in a recent post I couldn't come up with very many unanswered questions, but when you really start to think about it, there are so many left. But last night's episode did answer some of my requests:

1. Adam and Eve
2. Kind of answered what the Smoke Monster is
3. What Jacob is (but why did he turn to ash when he died? Wait. I know! Because his body is so old that that is all that is left!)

So, for now, I am going to rest with the notion that this will all make sense. Looking back on the final episodes of last season, I was so disappointed with the second to last episode that I almost quit the show. But the finale blew my mind.

I hope that happens again.

Happy Mother's Day

Another Mother's Day is here. Once again, I'm a little blue. But, what can you do? Maybe I shouldn't dwell on the sadness of not having a mom to call, visit, gift something to. Maybe I should just feel happy for all of the moms out there that I know and wish them the best day they can have.

So, happy Mother's Day, Moms!

Don't Go Changin'

I like Billy Joel. This is a statement made by many many women my age. I'm pretty sure I received Billy Joel's greatest hits in the mail when I moved into my first apartment. Every girl owns it and has put it in for many drunken sing alongs with her friends. But, I don't love Billy Joel. In fact, I get bored with him rather quickly. But there are three songs of his that I will always listen to, and they might surprise you. They are:

"She's Got Away"

"She's Always A Woman To Me"

"Just the Way You Are"

Yep. My 3 favorite songs of his are 3 somewhat trite odes to Christie Brinkley. Okay, I don't know if that's who he wrote them for, but I'm sure at some point in the mid-80s, he sang them to her.

I don't know why I like these songs so much. They are incredibly cheesy. Filled with sax solos. Lyrics that are kind of sexist and condescending. But, I don't know. They kind of warm my heart. I think they are also his best vocal performances. Sure, he sounds exactly like Paul McCartney, but he sounds nice.

The best of the bunch is "She's Got A Way". It's one of those songs that stops me in my tracks. I just kind of smile and feel all girly.

Go give them a listen.

Lost, The Final Season, Episode 13, "The Candidate"

If there's one thing this show does well, it's breaks your heart. Holy crap it has been 3 days since this episode aired and I still get the shivers thinking about it. I don't even know what to say about it. Lost is ending and they are closing loops and some of those closing loops consist of characters whose story is, well, done. And then, so are they.

So on Tuesday, we said goodbye to four, yes FOUR, of our beloved characters. Our friendly "chesty" Pilot, our wounded soldier Sayid, and most heartbreakingly so, everyone's favorite couple: The Kwons.

Why does the death of Jin and Sun hurt so much more than Sayid? Is it because Sayid died once already this season? Most likely. His (second) death happened in such a flurry that I'm still not quite sure it happened, though I know it did.

But Jin and Sun, we had to watch that one. It was slow. It was unexpected. It was brutal. Drowning together. Drowning must be one of the worst ways to go and to think Jin chose to go that way to stay with his wife, is, well, too much to think about. Of course, the fact that they have a daughter off Island that he could have raised makes it seem a bit selfish. But maybe, deep down, they both knew they were never getting off The Island and decided to accept their fate at their choosing. Or, at least Jin's choosing. Sun was kind of stuck there. Literally.

But I'm getting too sappy. But it was a sappy episode. Lots and lots of tears. By everyone.

Off Island

Locke wakes up in the hospital to a smiling Jack. Jack had just saved his life after he had been run down by Desmond. They talk about how they were on the same flight and their conversation at the airport. Jack wants to know how Locke became paralyzed in the first place because Jack knows he can fix him. But Locke doesn't want to be fixed.

Our New! and Improved! Jack who wants all the answers anyone can give him decides he's going to find out why Locke doesn't want to be fixed. So he goes to see his dentist. Because why not start there? Surprise! Surprise! It's Dr. Bernard, DDS. Yep. Locke's dentist is our beloved Bernard. After a brief conversation, they both discover that they, too, were on that same Oceanic Flight 815. Jack seems to be getting a little creeped out by this. Understandably so. Imagine running into several random people in really odd ways that you shared a really random flight with. It's kind of strange, right?

Jack asks Bernard if he knows how Locke was paralyzed, but Bernard can't tell him due to patient confidentiality. But he does give him the name of the person that was in the accident with him: Anthony Cooper, Locke's dear old dad. I wonder how much my dentist knows about me? Probably more than I would like.

Jack finds Anthony Cooper is in a nursing home. Guess this life didn't work out quite as well for Mr. Cooper. Locke's fiance, Peg Bundy, is there. She asks Jack to leave them alone. We get to meet Anthony Cooper. He's a complete vegetable. Jack finally gets it. Yep. Sideways World is not a good place for Anthony Cooper.

Jack returns to the hospital to check on Locke. Locke is sleeping and mumbling something about "push the button" and "I wish you would have believed me". Hmmmm...sounds like someone is dreaming about The Island. But then Claire shows up and asks to talk to Jack. Their dad had left her a music box and she doesn't know why. He sits down next to her to check it out. They open it up and there is a mirror that they both look into and I'm left to wonder: What if the Shephard listed on the cave walls is not Jack or his dad, but Claire? Technically she is a Shephard, she just doesn't share the name. Is that too much of a stretch? She's obviously somewhat important. She should be long dead by now and she is so tied to Smokey and he seems to have a good grip on her. Most likely this is not the case. But just a thought.

Jack tells her that their dad drank himself to death in an alley. Not the greatest guy. It's also interesting to note that in both worlds, his coffin goes missing. Why is that? Jack does eventually find it on The Island, but Christian's body isn't there. Will that happen when the coffin inevitably shows up in this world?

Jack offers to let Claire stay at his house. Blah blah blah.

Locke is discharged and Jack meets him in the hallway. He tells him he went to see his dad. This, obviously, irritates Locke, but he tells him what happened. Locke got his pilot license. He was going to take his first flight and asked his dad to join him. His dad is terrified of flying, but agreed to go along. They barely got off the ground before it all went wrong. Now his dad is a vegetable and Locke is in a wheelchair and Jack finally gets it. Of course Locke doesn't want to be fixed. In his mind, this is his punishment. (And once again I have to add that Terry O'Quinn is a fantastic actor) Jack says that Locke needs to let go and move on. Locke begins to wheel away and Jack tells him one more time that he can fix him and "I wish you'd believe me". This gives Locke pause, but he continues on.

It also makes me think that maybe Jack HAS to fix Locke, in more ways than one. Maybe he has to fix him in the Sideways World to make everything right again. Maybe if he fixes Sideway's Locke, it will knock Locke's "soul" from Smokey and make Smokey worthless.

And, on a completely other note, isn't it crazy how Smokey has become the most important thing on the show? It started out so random and then everyone assumed the writers would never explain what it is (which they still haven't - but they're getting close) and that it would just be the sort of horror aspect to the show, but look at it now and how important it is. Craziness.

Speaking of Smokey...

On The Island

Jack wakes up in one of the rafts and Sayid is just sitting there. Sayid welcomes Jack to Hydra Island. Jack wants to know why Sayid is sticking with UnLocke (again with the questions, Jack!). Sayid said because he saved his life and he also just saved Jack's. UnLocke appears and says he needs Jack's help to get the rest of his gang to trust him. Jack asks, once again, why he should trust him. UnLocke reiterates Sayid's point that he has done nothing but save everyone. Of course, he also throws in the point that he could kill Jack right then and there and Jack could do nothing to stop it. Point taken.

Further in on Hydra Island, Widmore's folks are putting up the Pylon fence again and they have the rest of our Losties captured (Sawyer, Kate, Jin, Sun, Hurley, and The Pilot). They lead them at gunpoint to the cages. The same cages Kate and Sawyer were locked in back in season 3 (?). Sawyer refuses to go back in and grabs the gun from one of the goons. Widmore shows up and points a gun at Kate and says he will shoot her if Sawyer doesn't cooperate. He tells them all he has a list of names and Kate's not on it so he doesn't need her. Sawyer drops his gun and they all enter the cage. Widmore tells them this is for their own good because "he's coming".

And I might get Widmore's mission now. I think Widmore always felt he was supposed to be the Richard or the Ben to Jacob, but he never got the chance. Now all he knows is that there is a list of people that Jacob has deemed Candidates to replace him and Charles needs to protect them all so he can get the eternal life that Richard received from whichever one of these Losties is the Ultimate Candidate. So, yes, he is trying to save them, but for his own selfish purpose.

While caged, Jin and Sun share a nice little moment talking about their daughter and Sun gives him back his wedding ring. And then...

....here comes Smokey. It's always so cool when Smokey shows up. The effects and the noises. And then he starts killing everyone. The goons start shooting at him because that's what you do. Any video game you've ever played, whenever you encounter a new boss, you shoot at it first to see what kind of damage it will do. Of course, on Smokey, it does nothing. He's smoke. He smashes the guard with the cage key right by the cage. Kate tries to get the key but then Jack shows up and lets them all out. He tells Kate that he's with Smokey now. Do you think Jack got to see UnLocke morph into Smokey? That would be cool to witness.

They head into the jungle and run into Sayid. They decide to get to the plane so they can get off this crazy Island. Except for Jack. He'll help them get to the plane, but he's staying.

Oh my goodness this is a long recap.

Of course, UnLocke gets to the plane first and scopes it out. First he kills to the two guard goons and then he heads into the plane where he discovers a bomb...or does he? Outside, the gang has just shown up. UnLocke shows them the bomb he pulled from the plane and says Widmore set them up and they can't trust the plane anymore. They'll have to take the sub. Back on the road, kids.

Sawyer thank UnLocke for saving them again, but then secretly tells Jack that he doesn't trust him. He asks Jack for a favor. If he's going to stay behind anyway, please help them keep Smokey off the sub so they can get away. Jack agrees.

They get to the sub and one by one make their way to it, watching for goons the whole way. Jack and UnLocke are the last ones to get to the pier. But then Widmore's folks show up and start shooting. In the chaos, Jack pushes UnLocke in the water! and everyone runs to the sub and then it happens. Kate. Gets. Shot. Right in the chest. There's no way she can survive this, right? Right? (I can't believe I can't find a picture of this moment)

Jack carries her to the sub. Claire is still left on the pier shooting randomly and then out of the water climbs UnLocke like Jecht in Final Fantasy X at the very end. It's all sorts of awesome. He starts shooting at everyone. Sawyer pops out of the sub to check on Claire, but he sees UnLocke heading for him and closes the hatch and tells the captain (who is being held at gunpoint by The Pilot) to dive. Outside of the sub, Claire starts freaking out because everyone left her again. But UnLocke tells her she doesn't want to be on that sub.

On the sub, Jack is tending to Kate. He's trying to find a first aid kit and asks Hurley to get the one out of his backpack. Unfortunately for Kate, there's no first aid kit. But, there is a bomb. And it's set to explode in less than 4 minutes. Sayid and Sawyer want to disarm it, but Jack realizes that UnLocke has set them up. It's been one long con. They all did exactly what he wanted. He needs them all to be dead All of the candidates, so that he can leave The Island. But the rules state that he can't kill them, so he needs for them to kill each other. So he got them all in one confined space and placed a bomb in there. If one of them tries to disarm it, it will go off and kill them all. He believes that if they leave it alone, nothing will happen. But Sawyer ain't buyin' it. He pulls the plug on the bomb and at first it stops. But then it starts to count down even faster. Sayid picks it up (odd how Sayid is suddenly back to normal). He tells Jack that Desmond is in a well and that UnLocke wants him dead, so he must be useful (yay! Sayid didn't kill him!). He then tells Jack that Jack's "the one" and runs off with the bomb! He heads to the opposite end of the ship just in time for it to explode. And there goes Sayid. See you in another life, brother.

Since this is a sub and it's under water, it starts to fill with water. The Pilot leaves the captain to see what happened and a door flies open and flattens him. Dead. Oh, Pilot, we hardly knew ya. That's 2 down.

Water is filling up in the sub quickly. In the chaos, Sun has become stuck behind some cabinet. Jack hands our bleeding Kate off to Hurley and tells him to get out quickly. The rest of the boys try to move the cabinet. They manage to get it away but in the chaos, Sawyer is hit in the head and knocked out. And Sun is not quite free. She is all intertwined in some railing. How did she get into this mess so quickly? Now Jack can't help because he has to hold on to Sawyer, so it is up to Jin. He is trying to free her but reality sets in. He tells Jack to go and save himself and Sawyer. Jack resists at first, but then leaves as the water starts to reach their shoulders.

Jin is left trying to free Sun, but she knows it is useless. She begs him to leave, but he tells her he will never leave her again. And he knows it is useless, too. And it's all just too much. It not like they even were just killed off, they were brutally killed off. Drowned. Together. At this point I am sobbing uncontrollably. Remember just last episode I said I didn't care about these two anymore. Yeah. I was wrong. Dammit. This sucks.

Jack, Kate, Sawyer, and Hurley all wash up on the beach. Oh, hey, Kate's still alive. Nevermind the bullet to the chest, the sub sinking, and the almost drowning. She's still going strong. Well, not strong. She asks about Sun and Jin. And then she starts to sob and then they all start to sob. And it's all very very sad. Think of all the people who originally crashed on The Island. This is all that's left. Sure, Claire is still technically around, but she's not really quite there anymore. We're just down to 4. And I know I just said in my last Lost post that if they all lived happily ever after, that would be lame. But I've changed my mind. I want them all to be happy.

Back on the pier, UnLocke senses what happened. He tells Claire that the sub sank but some made it out and now he has to "finish what I started".

The End.

Next week it looks like we get the history on Smokey and Jacob. And that should be cool. But, I think it's also time we check in on Richard, Ben, and Miles. I still want my cool Ben moment. And wasn't it Richard who was off to the plane to put the bombs on it? So were those his bombs or Widmore's? What are they up to? I miss them.

And I miss Sun and Jin. And Sayid. And even The Pilot.

Dammit.

Recommended Listening

I just picked up two great albums this past week.

Mimicking Birds - Mimicking Birds

A beautiful folk album. Lead singer, Nate Lacy, sounds eerily similar to Modest Mouse frontman Isaac Brock, fittingly so as Isaac Brock produced the album. It sounds like a Modest Mouse: Folk version. I don't say that to undermine the album, as it is truly beautiful. A great album to listen to on headphones so you can pick up all the little bits and pieces that were put into it.

The XX - XX

This is one of those bands that people start to talk about but I never hear and have a hard time believing they are really a band and not something made up by hipsters to seem super cool. But, yes, they are a band and their album is beautiful. I assumed, by their name, that they would be some noisy feedback trio. But their songs lean more towards The Cure than Sonic Youth. They are sad young adults singing trippy sad love songs...and it's awesome.

Also recently discovered:

Janelle Monae - "Tightrope". All I can say is, check out this video and then try not to walk around your house doing this dance. I dare you.